I've always had a feeling that I would die young. Ever since I started pondering on deaths door I've had this feeling. I could care less about the hell and heaven shenanigans, but death. I want it. The end of my life.
I want to be in my suit, in my...
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Hate is a strong word, but it's the only word that can describe what I feel when I see her.
Every glance I have shared with her has sent nothing but pure sickness to my stomach. Her dark hair I once ran my finger through are curled and tucked behind her ear. Her bright smile that once smiled at me. Her dark eyes that once looked at me. All these things that once brought me joy now makes me feel replaceable.
Arti pretends as if what happened in Paris is a big joke that I should forget.
We're currently in History class. The shutters are drawn and the projector is on as it plays a movie about the event we're currently learning.
Dylan is fast asleep with his head on the desk and his arms being a pillow for him. All I'm able to see is his outgrown hair and a bit of his right eyebrow. Otherwise, he's completely hidden.
Our teacher doesn't notice that almost half the class is asleep considering that he's asleep as well. I tried to fall asleep, but with the meth adrenaline coursing through my veins, I'm physically unable to. Instead, I'm jabbing the sharp part of my pencil into my eraser. I watch as the led leaves a dark shadow in each hole, but when that makes me bored, I go to making my eraser a stamp.
By taking a pen out of my blazer, I begin writing my name backwards on my eraser before I stamp it onto my hand. My name appears faintly on my skin. My lip forms a line in satisfaction. I then begin to write Nida's name backwards before stamping it again.
A small smile appears on my face as I stare at the faint blue ink. I do it a couple more times before I move to straight up drawing on my skin.
It starts off with a simple smiley face before it branches off into a checkered pattern on my thumb, middle and pinky finger. I draw swirls on the other fingers, a random yin yang in the middle, an infinity sign, multiple hearts. Whatever comes to mind, I draw it on my hand.
Names, places, things. It's on here. I've got leaves that grow down my forearm and spiders crawling them. "You do know you're going to get skin poisoning?" I hear a voice call.
My head shoots up to see Arti staring at my hand in disgust. I mimic her face. "Oh my god, I don't fucking care." I scoff, shaking my head and going back to my "tattoo."
Her eyes don't leave me like I expect them to do. "It's skin poisoning." She says again with her eyes wide and her lips parted.
I roll my eyes, looking up at her with my nose scrunched up and a resting bitch face on. "Okay, pay for my treatment. Plan my funeral. Cry about it." I go back to my arm, finally feeling her take her eyes off me.
I can't wait to graduate so I don't have to see her face ever again. Avoiding her in the estate during the summer will be easy especially since I will barely be at my house.
After that, I'll be across the world studying whatever degree I choose to take.
And I've already banned Arti from Overdrive so that saves me as well.
