I've always had a feeling that I would die young. Ever since I started pondering on deaths door I've had this feeling. I could care less about the hell and heaven shenanigans, but death. I want it. The end of my life.
I want to be in my suit, in my...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
The goodbyes at the wedding was emotional. Nida had tears in her eyes as she hugged her sister, not wanting to let her go. Everyone was sad except for Rohan who had smoke grenades as a celebration for her leaving. He handed me one, asking me to wave it around with him and he danced to the celebratory music he was playing. Whatever happened after that is a blur.
My eyes slowly open, my vision hazy, my body feels cold, but sweat covers my brows. I feel my face against the hard floor and as I lift my head, looking around. I lay on my stomach with my arms and legs spread out. Almost as if I fell asleep on the floor.
I have sweatpants on and a normal t-shirt, indicating that I changed once I came home. I feel Dog near me as he sniffs me. I begin to lift my body off the ground when I notice a pool of black vomit. Black saliva drips out of my mouth and I feel physically ill looking at it.
Why's it black?
My heart pounds out of my chest and my stomach drops, making feel even more sick. My stomach hurts as I push myself away from the vomit. I cover my mouth as I feel like I'm about to throw up again.
Heat covers my face, but I keep my jaw locked to keep the panic from rising. I breath heavily, spinning around my room. The mess covered cave looks worse than usual. My unmade bed, the clothes on my desk chair, my disarranged dresser covered with bloody tissues. My eyes land onto the used needle on my desk with the burnt spoon beside it. The open water bottle drips water onto my floor and I run to the desk, grabbing everything and quickly hiding it.
It's unlike me to shoot up in my room after my dad searched through my room. I usually go to Neveah's bedroom since no one will enter her dead room.
I lift my hand to my hair when I see something on my left arm. The bruises I see all over it isn't what catches my attention. It's the big red mark that oozes pus. Layers of my skin is gone and it seems like it's bleeding. No, no, no!
It hurts and it makes my stomach churn causing me to quickly spin around to the door. I yank it open, bolting out of the door. I run down the stairs, towards the kitchen to find the medicine cabinet to see if I can bandage it up. Unfortunately my running is cut short when I hear the sound of voices downstairs. I run back upstairs, grabbing a hoodie and throwing it over my t-shirt.
I swallow down any panic, casually walking into the kitchen. The smell of fresh coffee hits my nose.
On the counter I see Norah sitting by the counter dressed up. My mother is pouring a cup of coffee and I can hear the running shower upstairs stop. My eyebrows pull together as I look around the room. "What's going on?" I ask, walking towards my mother.
"We're going out for breakfast." My mother says calmly. My heart does this weird flip as I look around. Breakfast isn't something we do in my family. For years I've had breakfast on my own which is a bowl of Shreddies because of all the boxes I bought when I got high with Dylan and a glass of soda. It's balanced enough to make it through the first three periods of the day.
