Watch Me Drown

40. Boxes

(Abby's point of view)

We spent that afternoon at my parent's house. My mother went grocery shopping, so it was just me, Julien, and my dad. He wasn't as bad as my mom. Just don't have an attitude or argue with him. If you argue, you're screwed. He never hit me. Neither of them did. It was just terrible when he was mad.

The next day, I showed Julien all around town. I brought her to my old school, then the library, my favorite restaurant for lunch, and then the park. It was really cool to show her my little childhood world. She had shown me her old town years ago. Now it was my turn.

Finally, the third day came. I did it! I made it! Three whole days! Lucy stopped by our hotel room that morning.

"You giving up today?" She asked me. "Or are you going back?"

I smiled, smug. "We're going back."

Julien was in the shower. I had joined her, just for a little bit, but got out when my body started to reject it.

"Well," Lucy said. "We'll see. I'll be back tonight."

"Stop by an ATM on your way!!" I called after her as she walked down the hall.

She just waved.

I continued getting ready. Me and Julien had given up on looking good enough for my parents. We were back to band t-shirts and whatever pants we wanted. My parents probably thought that Julien had only packed one pair of pants. She had actually packed multiple pairs of almost identical black skinny jeans. What else would she wear?

I'd gotten better with being at the house. I didn't cry anymore. I was kind of numb, except for when we got in the car and I vented. I practically yelled. It was only a matter of time before I got into an argument with my mother, or father, or both.

That time was the third day.

Julien was going to make dinner that night. I think she wanted to impress my parents.

"I need to get some ingredients from the grocery store at some point today," She told me during the drive to the house. "Do you want to come with me? Or are you fine staying there?"

"I'll..." I said after a few minutes of thinking. "I'll stay."

Julien looked at me, her eyes wide.

"What?" I asked. "Is it insane that a person is fine being alone with their parents?"

"In this case," She said. "Yes."

"I want to see my bedroom." I admitted quietly, looking at my hands in my lap. "And I don't want an audience."

She was quiet. After a moment, I looked at her, and she nodded.

"Okay." She said simply.

And that was that. The plans were set. Fate was aligned. I don't know why I'm trying to be poetic here. Shit happens, and it happened to me that day.

***

"You sure you'll be okay?" Julien asked me.

We were standing by the front door. My parents were watching TV in the living room. After Julien left, I would join them.

"Yes," I said. "Plus, walking around a supermarket would be a lot for me."

"I don't know," Julien disagreed. "You've been pretty good lately."

I shrugged, then groaned. "I'm an old lady!"

She laughed, and kissed me.

"No, you're not." She smiled.