The Unknown Jellicle

The Rum Tum Tugger

As soon as Jenny spoke her last few words, "Thank you my dears!", Munkustrap's ornery long-haired gold tabby brother popped out of a corner of the yard. His immediate appearance shocked some of the cats as he ripped a nearby poster and merely let out a deep meow. He dropped down from his hiding place and meowed again, this time more directed towards me. I rolled my eyes as I attempted to slink over towards Quaxo, but to no avail as Tugger moved forwards towards me. I exhaled dramatically and stuck next to Bomba and Deme as the group started to sing.

All: The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat.
Tugger: If you offer me pheasant, I'd rather have grouse. If you put me in a house I would much prefer a flat. If you put me in a flat, I would rather want a house.

As Tugger sang, he sauntered over to Jemima full of arrogance and swagger as he motioned for her to dance with him. Understandably, she accepted with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. He kneeled as he sang the next line.

Tugger: If you set me on a mouse than I'd rather have a rat. If you set me on a rat than I'd rather chase a mouse!

He then out of nowhere kicked a volleyball right next to the car that my brother sat on top of. Quaxo let out a surprised hiss along with Jellylorum who was nearby.

All: The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat.
Tugger: And there isn't any cause for me to shout it.

As he sings this, Etcetera walked up next to him and he basically hip thrusted her away. She gasped in awe and fell backwards, only to be caught by Ademetus who sneered at the popular Tom.

All: For he will do as he will do...
Tugger: And there's no doing anything about!

A piano solo rocked the yard as Tugger danced around like the young Tom he was. I could see him looking around for me, but I stayed hidden next to Demeter. He semi-shrugged and pointed at Jemima and she smiled one of the biggest and surprised smiles that I have ever seen on a cat. Suddenly, Quaxo appeared right next to him as he sang in a somewhat monotone voice.

Quaxo: The Rum Tum Tugger is a terrible bore.
Tugger: When they let me in then I wanna go out. I'm always on the wrong side of every door. As soon as I get home then I like to get about. I like to lie in a burrow drawer, but I make such a fuss if I can't get out.

As he sings this, Tugger "accidentally" pushes down Tumblebrutus and Pouncival as they land on their front paws. Expressions full of annoyance were present on both of the toms as I decided to make my way next to Tugger. Demeter grabbed my paw before I could move, "Where are you going?" I smirked, "Going to give Tugger a bit of his own medicine."

All: The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat.
Tugger: And there isn't any use for you to doubt it.
All: For he will do as he will do...
Tugger: And there's no doing anything about it!

Bomba looked at me and I at her as we nodded in unison, we had the exact same idea. As Tugger was scratching under Jemima's chin, we broke out in our own line.

Bombalurina and Arabella: The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious beast.
Tugger: My disobliging ways are a matter of habit.

Bomba then made her way over to Tugger as they danced intimately as Tugger kept singing.

Tugger: If you offer me fish, then I would want a feast.  If there isn't any fish, then I won't eat a rabbit. If you offer me cream, then I'll sniff and sneer.

It was then that Bomba leaned backwards in front of Tugger while he sniffed her, what I believed to be, fondly.

Tugger: Then I only like what I find for myself... No.

He then struts away from Bomba as she falls down on her front paws like Tumblebrutus and Pouncival had previously. She had an expression of annoyance, also like the pair of toms, mixed with a hint of sadness. But, Bomba never gave up on anything. She immediately stood back up and danced with him as he sang more.

Tugger: So you'll catch me right up to my ears if you put it away on the larder shelf.
All: The Rum Tum Tugger...
Arabella and Bombalurina: Is awful annoying.
All: The Rum Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle.
Tugger: But I'll leap in you lap in the middle of your sewing because there's nothing I enjoy like a horrible muddle!
All: The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat, the Rum Tum Tugger doesn't care for a cuddle.

Tugger then bolted to the other side of the yard and interrupted Jennyanydots and Jellylorum's sewing and kissed them both on the cheek. He ran back to where we all were and the song progressed.

All: The Rum Tum Tugger is a curious cat.
Tugger: And there isn't any use for me to spout it.
All: For he will do as he will do

The song slowed as the kittens surrounded Tugger and he twirled his hips around with every word. They would squeal so loud after every single twirl that I was sure that I would go deaf after this. Etcetera squealed the loudest that it could almost shatter glass. Tugger placed his hand on her mouth and as he sang the last line, she passed out.

Tugger: There's no doing anything about... ow wow wow... About it!