Follow me home (Frerard)

Faking this calm has taken it's toll

Gerard's POV

"You're awesome. You know that, right?" Gerard spins around in his desk chair, grinning to himself. Through the phone pressed against his ear, he hears Ray chuckle. "No seriously," He reiterates. "You are the best."
"Yeah, yeah." He can practically hear him rolling his eyes. "Honestly, I haven't seen Frank this happy in a long time. I think you're a good guy, Gerard. But if you hurt him at all, I will murder you and make it look like an accident. Understand?"
He can't really help the smile still playing on his lips when he nods. "Understood."
"Good." Gerard can tell Ray is smiling too. "Now I think Frank's coming, I gotta go. Like I said, I'll have Matt call you tomorrow and get all of the details sorted out. See you soon."
It's just at that time that Gerard hears Frank's voice in the distance, bitching about gas station bathrooms and their lack of sanitation, and then the line goes silent. He wants that voice back, thinks about calling Frank right now, but figures it can wait. If everything goes as planned, he'll be hearing that voice in person soon enough.
---
The next day, when his phone rings with an unknown number, Gerard can't answer it fast enough.
"Gerard?" The unfamiliar voice asks on the other end. "I'm Matt. Ray told me to call you, told me a bit about what's going on. I think it's awesome what you want to do for your boyfriend."
He wants to correct Matt, but can't really find his mistake offensive; Technically, Frank is not his boyfriend. That entailed a mutual agreement to use the term, something neither of them had spoken about. But if someone wanted to mistake Frank as Gerard's boyfriend, he wouldn't argue.
"So we're not actually meeting up with Ray's band until Halloween," Matt continues. "But I talked to the guys and we'll be passing through New York a few days before. If you don't mind spending a couple days in a van with four smelly dudes, you're welcome to join us then."
He thinks that over. It doesn't sound compelling, that's for certain. But then Matt adds, "Otherwise, we'll be headed west and you'll have to hitch a ride there yourself."
"I'll come," Gerard says immediately. "In the van. With you guys."
Matt chuckles softly. "Man, you must be smitten." Gerard fights back the blush he can feel rising on his cheeks, glad that Matt can't see the effect his words have on him because he's right; Gerard is completely smitten.
They talk a bit longer, setting up the details of when and where Gerard would meet the band, what he would bring (because no way does Gerard know what the necessities are when living in a van, for even a few days) and then Gerard hangs up the phone feeling something stirring deep in his stomach. Excitement, nerves, fear. It's all bundled up into one big knot in his gut.
Gerard flips the phone in his hands over a few times and then pulls up Mikey's number. When he answers, sounding bored, Gerard can feel the grin widening on his face. "Hey baby brother," He says. "You need to pack a bag. We're going to Oregon."
---
The backseat is too fucking small, Ian smells like sweaty potato chips, and Mike and Mikey won't shut the hell up. The latter two had taken to each other like magnets, bonding over their common name, and claimed the front seat to themselves, leaving Gerard in the middle seat with Ian, who was asleep and snoring in Gerard's ear. In the farthest seats back, Josh and Matt spoke animatedly about something Gerard didn't care enough to eavesdrop on.
Gerard can't stumble out of the van fast enough when they finally stop at a gas station. He stretches his legs and waits for his turn in the bathroom, then scavenges the aisles for food. When he's stocked up on fruit cups and granola bars, he makes his way back out to the van.
Inside, he pulls his phone free from his pocket. He clicks and swipes a few things before finding what he wants. The Youtube video starts playing and Gerard sees through the unsteady cameraman's point of view a crowd of surging bodies and beyond that a stage. Sitting in the center of the stage, with a guitar in his hands, is Frank. His voice sounds kind of far off through the shitty speaker, distant, but it's enough when the song begins to play. It surrounds Gerard with a warmth he hasn't felt since Frank left to go on tour and it makes him feel better. At the end of the song, Frank is crying softly-- Not enough to really catch unless you're paying close attention, but it's there and it makes Gerard's heart swell. He's restarting the video when Josh claims the seat next to him.
Josh is quiet at first, watching silently over Gerard's shoulder. "So that's Frank?" He wonders when the song is done again.
Gerard nods and brushes a few fingers through his newly blond hair, feeling proud of his not-quite-boyfriend.
Josh smiles. "He's good. I can't wait to meet him. What's he like?"
And that is just enough to make Gerard start talking about Frank and never shut up. The next few hours and towns are spent with Gerard's animated spiels, talking about just about every aspect of Frank. Josh watches with a gleam in his eye, amused and awed by Gerard's ability to talk nonstop about someone with so much passion. By the time the sun goes down, Gerard's throat is hoarse and Josh is asleep, but that's okay with both of them because Gerard spots a sign outside the window welcoming them to Portland, Oregon and his heart just about stops anyway.
---
Gerard can't breathe. He feels nervous and anxious and frightened. He shouldn't be scared, none of these people are going to hurt him. But the fact that there are so many people is reason enough to have him terrified. He is not good with people, and these strangers are loud, tipsy, and he's pretty sure some of them are actually breeding in the far corner. He averts his eyes and focuses on the surrounding faces, looking for one that's familiar. He lost his brother, Josh, Ian, Mike, and Matt all in the crowd within minutes of coming inside. Now, he stands alone in the kitchen, watching as the bowls of various brightly colored pills disappear and bottles of dark amber liquid are slowly drained.
Frank is supposed to be here. Ray fucking promised that Frank would be here. It was his fucking party, right? This is the whole reason Gerard is here. But as Gerard looks around again, he frowns. Gerard traveled halfway across the damn country in a van crammed with five other sweaty, smelly men to surprise Frank on his birthday. He should be here.
Gerard leaves the kitchen. He wanders around for a bit before running into Ray... Who has his tongue down Mikey's throat.
Mikey has the decency to look bashful when Gerard practically pries them apart, but Ray looks nothing less than completely stoned. "Where is he?" Gerard demands. He has to yell to be heard over the music, but Ray doesn't seem to understand the question anyway. Gerard leans closer. "I said, where the fuck is he!?"
Ray shakes his head lamely. "Who?"
"Frank," Gerard states, rolling his eyes. "Where the hell is Frank?"
Ray looks surprised. "Oh, Frank! Yeah, he went..." The other man looks around him for  minute and then points toward the next room in the somewhat abandoned hotel. "Over there? Yeah, I think he went in there." Ray nods, his hair bobbing along in agreement. And then, without another word, he's back on Mikey and Gerard leaves them alone before things get rated R. Instead, he sets his sights on the room Ray directed him to. Taking a deep breath, he pushes the door open and steps inside.
---
Gerard feels like he's floating. The bed around him is warm, inviting and enticing, but he can't sleep. He turns over on the mattress only to be met with a gorgeous, slack-jawed face he would know anywhere. A smile forms on his lips and Gerard presses a kiss to Frank's nose. The younger man mutters something in his sleep, nuzzling closer into the sheets.
Last night was amazing. Gerard still feels the post-coitas bliss surrounding him. He allows his eyes to trace over Frank, completely naked and only partially covered with the blanket. He's beautiful.
After finding Frank on the couch last night, kind of stoned and definitely horny, Gerard couldn't really control himself. He kissed Frank deeply and allowed himself to touch the man he'd been pining over for months. And when Gerard blindfolded Frank (it was totally payback for the blindfolding Frank had done that first night they'd met) and taken him back to the hotel room, Gerard had his way with a very willing and excited Frank. It sort of bothered Gerard that Frank was stoned, but every time the younger man opened his mouth, a moan slipped out. He could barely even form words, but his actions spoke volumes when he wrapped himself around Gerard and groaned Gerard's name, begging for more.
Gerard figures that Frank will probably still be out for a few hours and, with a heavy sigh, climbs out of bed. He showers, dresses, and then makes his way downstairs in search of food. He finds Matt in the cafeteria, scarfing breakfast at a table by himself. Gerard sinks into the chair opposite him and Matt makes a vague noise of acknowledgement. When he's done eating, he looks up, pushing the empty plate back. "Ugh fuck me, my head hurts."
Gerard chuckles. Unlike everyone else at the party, Gerard stayed completely sober. And while he was admittedly uncomfortable around the tipsy strangers, he enjoyed watching them endure the hangovers. He leans back in his seat and flinches when a pain shoots up his back. Matt takes notice and smirks across the table.
"So you found your boyfriend last night," He says. "I take it things went well?"
"Things went incredible," Gerard smiles. "He's still sleeping. I came in search of food. You think I can find Pringles around here somewhere? I want some Pringles."
"No Pringles," Matt frowns. "But they have waffles and bagels."
Gerard is contemplating the food when his phone in his pocket starts going off. He pulls it free, seeing his brother's name flash across the screen. "What?" He answers.
"What happened to saying hello?" Mikey wonders. "You know, normal people say hello. Maybe a 'how are you?' or something of the sorts. You're rude."
"I'm hungry and I haven't had coffee," Gerard states. "Now what do you want?"
"Frank is awake."
Now Gerard is definitely interested, but... "Wait, how do you know that?"
"Because he just barged into the bathroom when Ray and I were about to get in the shower." And Mikey's voice is so casual, it almost catches Gerard off guard to realize his brother is talking about bathing with another man. And eww that's gross, Gerard really does not need to know about his brother's sex life. "But he seemed kind of freaked out when he saw me. He knows you're here, right? You found him last night."
"Yeah, we..." Gerard trails off-- He doesn't want to hear about Mikey's sex life and he doesn't want to share the details of his. "Saw each other. Back in the room."
Mikey pauses and then goes, "Eww." Gerard rolls his eyes and Mikey continues. "Anyway, he was really surprised. Like he didn't know I would be here. And then he went, "oh shit, Gerard" and then bolted. Ray tried to follow him, but by the time he got pants on, Frank was gone. I think he might be looking for you."
"Okay," Gerard says, thanking his brother and then hanging up only to have his phone buzz again, this time Frank's name appearing on the screen. He presses the phone to his ear and smiles. "Hey Frankie."
"Gee!" Frank gasps, his voice flooding with what sounds like relief and horror. "Holy shit, Gee, I'm... God, I'm so sorry. I think... I think something happened."
Gerard sits up straighter, trying to hear Frank more clearly. But his panicked voice is almost lost in the rushing of wind around him. Is Frank outside? Why the hell is he outside?
"Frank, calm down." Gerard tries his best to sooth Frank, but even he's starting to freak out. "What's wrong?"
Frank lets loose what Gerard thinks is a strangled sob sound. "I'm sorry, Gerard. I love you, you know that right?"
"Yeah, Frankie," Gerard says. "I know. But what are you sorry for? What happened?"
"Your brother is here," Frank says. And okay, random.
But Gerard nods along. "Yeah, I know. Dude, where are you?"
Frank hesitates. "Portland."
Gerard rolls his eyes. "Yeah, no shit. Me too."
And then Frank is really silent. A long moment passes and then he whispers, "You're here?"
"Of course I'm here," Gerard says. "I'm in the cafeteria with Matt right now."
"Cafeteria," Frank repeats, sounding confused. "The hotel? My hotel?"
"Yes," Gerard says slowly. "Hey, are you okay?"
"You're here," Frank says, like he's sorting out what he knows. Maybe he's still kind of stoned because he sounds really out of it. "In Portland. In my hotel. Where were you last night?"
Gerard chuckles. "With you. We met up at the party and I took you back here to the hotel and we... Uh..."
"We had sex," Frank states and alright, that's blunt. But he only sounds relieved. "Yes. Fuck yes. Wait, you're in the cafeteria?"
Gerard finds himself nodding. "Yeah. I woke up before you and came to find food."
Frank doesn't say anything, but a minute later, Gerard looks over to see him rush into the room. When their eyes meet, Frank looks beyond relieved, ecstatic, and he's rushing forward. Gerard barely has time to stand up before Frank is barrelling into his chest and twisting his arms around his waist. Gerard can only hug back, breathing in the scent of Frank when the shorter man sighs and says, "This is the best birthday present ever." And then their lips are connected and Gerard can't help but agree.