Shattered Love

Chapter 15: From The Eyes of A Man

The ticking sound of the clock filled the room as each minute passed by. Never once did it faltered his distraction towards tons of the paper works laid on his dark redwood desk. Nikolei let out a tired sigh. Slowly, he brought up his hand and painfully pinched the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger.

The stubble covered most part of his jaw was starting to get irritating. Nevertheless, he couldn't care less about it as it reminded him of what he was.

A miserable man.

That he was, ever since two years ago when he let the woman he used to love, or still was, leaves his house without any goodbyes. Most of his members of household was furious at him for letting such a wonderful woman left his side. Albeit, he did this for the best. The best for his sons's life. Everyone's life.

Did you? Or did you do this for that selfish grudge of yours?

His knuckles slowly turned white as he clenched his hands tightly. He was mad, mad at himself and mad at his conscience for stating the real truth when he himself had refused to believe that it was all true. That the truth was that he did what he did two years ago for his mere satisfaction, just to satisfy the need of his vengeance towards Alexandra.

No one knows how painful his heart restricted at the sight of Alexandra's pained expression when he had handed her the seperation agreement that night. But, he was too ego, too hypocrite to even admit his own feeling to himself. All he wanted was to engulf her in his warm hug and tell her that everything was going to be okay - just the way he comforted her back then but his feelings got the best of him.

He grumbled to himself, burying his face into the palm of his hands. The sound of the bell of the grandfather clock chimed throughout the crooks of his house, indicating that the time was three in the morning. Everyone was still sleeping soundly, leaving him feeling restless on his own as the night went by.

He couldn't sleep because if he did, all he think about was a certain red-haired woman. Even his brain had betrayed him after that night, so he just have to learn to accept the consequences.

Propping his feet up onto his desk, he tried his best to make himself comfortable against the cushioned leather chair. Suddenly, Nikolei's eyes stopped at the wooden photo frame which was holding a smiling photograph of Gayle and Alexandra. The two were smiling widely without any worries etched on each of their faces. A small smile tugged on his lips as he stared at the photo in front of him.

"Dad?" Gayle's head appeared from the small creak of the door.

Nikolei quickly put down the photograph when his son approached him and stood by his side. The little boy groggily smiled at him as he rubbed his eye tiredly. Timidly, he put up both of his arms, asking Nikolei to lift him up onto his lap.

Nikolei smiled at his son as he placed Gayle onto his lap, "Yes, son? Why are you awake so early in the morning?"

"I cannot sleep. Mom appeared in my dream again." Gayle answered sleepily. "She said she loves me and kissed me goodnight."

Nikolei sighed inwardly. Alexandra would always appear in Gayle's dreams most of the nights, and Gayle never once did he whined about it. Even so, he had come to love having them every night as they would remind him of her everyday so he wouldn't forget how she looks, speaks and of course, her sweet smile everytime Gayle was with her.

Gayle gently laid his head onto Nikolei's chest, listening to the calm heartbeat of his father's heart. His small hands encircled Nikolei's torso as Nikolei did the same. In a matter of time, Gayle fell asleep on his father's chest since his calm heartbeat always calmed him down after having the nightmares and dreams every night.