Playing The Straight Game [boyxboy]

22

Farren couldn't pinpoint the exact moment that he realised the extent of his feelings for Kaden, but he suspected that it was somewhere in between the 'Sonata in F' and 'River Flows in You.'

As he lay that night in Kaden's embrace, it was all he could do to keep himself from crying, or screaming with joy.

The truth was, he was terrified. What he felt for Kaden.. he had never felt that before.

Was it love? He didn't know. And he didn't want to know.. the answer was too scary to think about.

He checked the time on his phone.

4:06

Another sleepless night.

It had been a couple weeks since he had an insomniac spell this bad, and he suspected that it had something to do with sharing a bed with Kaden.

But now, as he lay in bed, he had no control of his whirring thoughts.

He found his train of thought heading towards a new but old destination; his parents.

And it was then that the tears began streaming down his face silently, as if daring him to feel.

He didn't often think of his parents, he had pushed their death to the back of his mind and acted as if nothing was wrong.

But it was at times like this, when he was most vulnerable, that how much he was missing them started to show.

He had seen them die, he knew that for a fact. But he couldn't remember it. The doctors had said it was some form of selective amnesia, that his brain had consciously blocked out the images from that day.

Farren was glad too, he couldn't imagine how haunting it would be to have to see that ever night.

But he missed them so fucking much.

He missed how much his father taught him all about football. He missed his mom collecting him from school, and walking home with him as they talked about their days.

And he missed the moments they never lived to see. He missed them when he scored his first touchdown in his debut football game. He missed them when he got an A in history last year, after almost failing the year before.

He lay their with hot tears running down his cheeks. He tried to be quiet for Kaden's sake, but could not stop small noises escaping his lips occasionally.

"Farren?" A voice croaked from beside him.

Oh shit.

"Yeah Kaden?" He whispered back, straining to keep his voice level.

"What's wrong Farry?"

"Nothing. Go back to sleep."

Kaden was silent for a moment, and just as Farren's though he had dropped it he felt a hand on his cheek.

"Hey, Farren. What's up?"

Farren could hear from Kaden's voice that he was fully awake now.