The Slash Stories

Bleach

"Yuzu, do you think Ichi-nii is gay?" Karin asked her sister.

"Why would you think that Karin-chan? Onii-chan is absolutely straight." Yuzu replied, 

"Ichi-nii is gay, and I know it." Karin insisted.

"Then prove it."

"Well, can you prove he's not gay? All the signs are there, and they all point to one thing. He swings the other way." Karin said.

"Oh really, what are the signs then?"

"Let's start with this: he's never gone out with a single girl. His lack of love life is pathetic. With his 'drop dead' looks and 'dark aura', women should be jumping at the chance to go out with him. He'll be old enough to vote after his next birthday, he can defeat captains, impossible odds, and a butterfly man, yet he hasn't gone on one date in his entire life? I don't want to lose my virginity before my older brother. Looking at how the situation is progressing, the probability of it happening is high." Karin explained, gesturing angrily with her hands.

"So what if he never dates Karin-chan. He still gets confessions." Yuzu argued.

"Which he rejects. Face it Yuzu, Ichi-nii doesn't like girls. He a seventeen year old guy. You clean his room every week right?" Karin started pacing back and forth on the grass, while Yuzu nodded from the swingset.

"Do you ever find any lube, dirty magazines or pornos?" Karin asked.

Yuzu's face flushed, and she answered with a soft no.

"What kind of healthy teenage boy doesn't masturbate or have some kind of curiosity towards the opposite sex. That alone makes me 90% sure he's gay."

At her brother's defense Yuzu protest. "But he does have an interest in girls. He brings girls home, and up to his room. Alone."

"Yeah, but that was Tatsuki-chan. They've been best friends since elementary so she doesn't count." Karin countered.

"He brought home Rukia-nee."

"She was been living in Ichi-nii's closet."

"It could be that he hasn't met the one yet."

"What are you talking about? He already met the one girl that every guy dreams about." Karin shouted.

"Who?"

"Orihime-chan, who else. Her boobs are like a f cup. He's around her almost every day, and he doesn't have any reaction at all. That's absurd."

"What if he just doesn't look at Orihime-chan that way?" Yuzu asked.

"It's fine if he doesn't feel a sexual connection, but he should have some physical reaction. Men can't always control their urges. If he can look at her, and not respond in any way . . . he's obviously gay."

"But what if onii-chan isn't attracted to big boobs?"

"Orihime just doesn't have a great figure she also has a good personality. All in all she's in a different league from the other girls. If you can find a girl more well-endowed than Orihime, I'll be surprised."

"No, wait. You know how he disappears all the time? He could be meeting his secret lover!" Yuzu announced after a bit of thinking.

"That's impossible Yuzu. He was always going out to train or to kill Hollows. He didn't have time before or during both wars to have a lover. Besides, after the Quincey War he was too depressed to go and find a girl to cheer him up." Karin shot down the idea immediately.

"Well, that's true. Onii-chan has no reason for us to believe that he's not gay." Yuzu stated, horror written on her face.

"Good. Now that we're on the same page, I think that we should make a list of who he might like."