golden longings

I

Hello,
I just very quickly want to clarify that these characters do not belong to Me, but to J.K. Rowling. If they were mine, they would all be gay.
I also want to apologize, sadly I have a very American English so if anyone has any tips to make this sound any more British, I would very much appreciate that. :)

~
He glanced around, trying not to stare anywhere. Trying to avoid meeting anyone's eyes. Actually, trying to avoid anyone at all.

The summer had been hard, but nothing compared to this, standing on the platform, waiting to get into the Hogwarts express. Alone. His friends were late, maybe they wouldn't show at all. Who could blame them? The mere thought made him feel shaky. He would not be able to do this on his own, worst case he would just have to leave.
But it was a little late, there was no going back now.

Draco took a deep breath. He wished that it had actually calmed him down, but it didn't do much. Just like every other time he had tried.
The loud noises,all the people around him talking, it was a lot. Draco could feel his anxiety build up inside, making his chest feel tight, his shoulders tense and his breath uneasy. This was all a terrible idea. Going back to Hogwarts after what he had done, everyone would hate him. Everyone.
Just meters from him, he saw Luna Lovegood walk on the train. He felt a sting in his tight chest. What his family had done to that girl, how did he even dare to walk onto the same train as her? He had no right to be here.

If it would've been just a few more minutes, Draco Malfoy would have turned around and ran away. From the noise, from his emotions, from himself.
But he didn't, as a soft hand laid on his shoulder.
"Hey, I am sorry I'm late, I hope it wasn't too bad" he turned around to look at Pansy. She had a small smile on her lips that actually reached her eyes. Draco felt his tensed muscles release a bit. He hadn't received a lot of genuine smiles lately.
A tiny smile danced around his lips as well as he hugged her. "Thank Merlin you showed, I would've been even more screwed on my own."
Seeing her here, he had really missed her, or having any friend at all.

Pansy rolled her eyes "I'm pretty sure we're still screwed, just together."
Before he could respong anything, they were being shoved into the train.
Now it was to finding an empty compartment.

It felt strange, being back in the Hogwarts express, it was just Like always, yet, everything was different. He sighed, getting a compartment of their own wouldn't be too hard, no one would want to sit with them.

As it appeared, he had been right. When Pansy opened the door to a compartment which they had believed to be empty, a disturbed 5th year jumped up and ran off, leaving the seats to them.

Pansy tried to smile, this time Draco didn't buy it.
"At least they make room for us. "
She chuckled.
"Yeah, and we don't even have to try to scare them anymore, only looking at them is enough."
Draco shook his head.
"No Pansy, you've always scared people off with your death glares."
He noticed Pansy looking down, sighing quietly before she mumbled :
"Just that I don't need to do the death glare anymore, everyone is terrified just by seeing me."
All light teasing and easiness in the atmosphere was gone.
Draco nodded slowly, sinking his hands into his lap. "I know." There was a short tense silence between them before the door burst open and Blaise walked in.

"Here you are, I've been looking for you everywhere. Stupid students, why do they all have to be so loud and annoying?"
Pansy shrugged, and so did Draco. Despite his attempt to, he couldn't even be mad at the exited bunch out there. Instead, a weird feeling seemed to have appeared in him. He wasn't quite sure what it was, probably something softer than he could allow himself to feel.