Then and Now

Finding Sammy

March 15th

Life for the Winchester's had been getting increasingly hard. Dean had been getting caught in more and more fights, he was becoming an outspoken and fierce kid. All you had to do was look into his always angry eyes and you could see that he would fight the entire world if he had to.

Sam on the other hand, was the opposite of his problem child of an older brother. He kept to himself, avoided everyone and wouldn't even smile anymore. 

Dean blamed Lilith. 

Now he was sitting in the dreaded dark cupboard, trying to keep the tears from falling as he curls up as tight as he could. Oh god he hated the dark. The small space was suffocating, he was going to die in there. Oh no, he couldn't breath. There wouldn't be much oxygen left. He was going to die. 

He trembled, now these thoughts had started, it wouldn't be long before he completely broke. But he couldn't because if he started yelling then Sam might hear him. And if Sam heard him then he'd try getting Dean out and god only knows what Lilith would do to the poor kid then. 

Dean had given up trying to ask what he had done wrong now. All he knew was that one moment he had been glaring at Alastair, and the next Lilith was throwing him in here again.

He just wanted help. So at first he tried praying because his mummy had always said that Angel's were watching over him.

Now he didn't bother. 

Tonight was the anniversary of his parent's deaths. Dean tried not to think about it, he already relived it every night when he went to sleep. But Sammy needed him.

How many years had passed now? Two? Dean knew that this was not many, you could count that on one hand after all, but at the same time it felt like a long time ago.

He shifted in the dark, biting his lip as a corner of a box dug into the fresh bruise on his side. How many times had he gotten into a fight today alone?

It wasn't his fault, the other boys always started it. Dean also couldn't help that he had quickly gotten good at this whole fighting thing... maybe he should teach Sammy some basic things, just to keep him safe of course.  

Dean wished he could fight Lilith. 

In the cupboard, Dean is unable to tell how long has actually passed before he's let out. All he knows is that it feels like an eternity each time. His mother used to tell him how there was a Heaven and a Hell, God and the Devil. Well, Dean felt like he was in this 'Hell' every time Lilith shoved him in here. 

He was beginning there were no Angel's looking out for him. Not anymore. 

Oh great, and now he was crying. Hot tears running down his cheeks, soaking into the neckline of his cotton t-shirt. There was no stopping the tears once they started, his silent sobs shaking through his body as he curled up into a tighter ball. 

He wanted his mummy. He often thought that she had surely ended up in Heaven as an angel, she had been such a beautiful person. So why wasn't she helping him?

"Mummy?" Dean's sobs into the darkness. He used to pray, now he just begged (which as far as he was concerned, was just the same as praying) and cried.

Eventually, he manages to cry himself into the arms of sleep. Though, even then he knew he wouldn't find much peace. No, all those nice dreams that child should have seemed to avoid him now. 

~~~~

As always, he was let out of the small space the next morning. His body hurt and cramped as he hurried up to his brother's room. 

Sam wasn't there. He also wasn't in the backyard, bathroom or kitchen. It was the weekend, so they didn't have school. Which left Dean wondering... where was Sammy?

Maybe Alastair had him. This thought made his blood boil in anger, he didn't care if the boy was bigger than him. If Alastair had Sammy then Dean would kill him. Okay, hat was maybe a tad harsh, but he would seriously beat him up.

He found Alastair in the basement. Which really wasn't all that surprising to Dean, after all the basement was the perfect place for creeps and monsters to hang out.

"Where's Sammy?" Dean demands, walking up to the older boy with clenched fists.

Alastair slowly looks up from his gameboy. "How should I know where that freak went?"

Flinching at the way the other boy spat out the word 'freak', Dean stood as tall as he could. "Who are you calling freak? Freak." Yeah, as soon as he bravely said these words, he regretted it. He was in for one hell of a beating now. 

Alastair stands up slowly, glaring at Dean. "What?"

What Dean should have done was apologize then and there. Unfortunately that went against Dean's code apparently for instead he puffs up his chest and says; "You heard me, you are a freak."

He saw the punch coming before Alastair even raised his fist. This doesn't stop him from reeling back in a pained daze as the blow hits the side of his face. He really didn't have time to fight, he needed to find Sammy... but then again if he backed down from a fight then Alastair would think he was really weak.

So Dean punched Alastair in the stomach. 

Then Lilith was there, grabbing both them by the arm and yanking them apart. Now they really had it coming. Alastair was breathing heavily, his gaze pure fury as he glared at Dean. 

"What the hell is going on here?" 

Dean exhaled in a huff, refusing to answer as he met the other boy's look with angry eyes of his own. 

"Well?" Lilith dug her nails into their arms.

Dean bit his lip, refusing to show any response to the pain that she was causing him. Alastair squares his shoulders and strangely enough stays silent as well.

"Maybe a wooden spoon could help jog your memories." 

Oh no. Dean feels a wave of cold fear, he still had the barely healed marks to show from his last beating. 

Lilith pulls them both upstairs, silent waves of anger seeming to radiate from her. Dean wriggled, trying to pull his arm free but her grip was like steel, her nails digging into his wrist. Even Alastair was trying to pull free, his cruel eyes for once filled with fear. 

"I knew that you and your brother would be trouble the moment you were first dumped at my feet." Lilith threw Dean against the wall. "So troublesome, but I suppose that's just because your parent's failed a disciplining you."

"They did not!" Dean hated this women with all his heart, no one said bad things about his mummy and daddy.

"Don't talk back to me boy." Lilith slaps him, hard. "It's bad manners." She grabbed the thick wooden stick, it was a joke to think of it as a simple spoon, and brings it down onto his back.

Alastair was huddled on the ground, Dean could feel his eyes on him as the evil woman brought the spoon down again and again. It hurt. So badly that it brought fresh tears to his eyes.

Still, he doesn't say another word, nor does he let out any more sounds of pain. He refused to let her break him like that. 

The door opened then, and who should walk in but little Sammy himself. He had evidently been crying, and rushed straight for Lilith as she smacked Dean over the head. He doesn't say anything of course, but as he weakly tried to grab Lilith's hand, it was obvious that he had come in to try and help his brother.

"Sam, no-" Dean wheezes in pain. 

"Oh look, the other troublesome pile of crap," she sneers down at Sam. "Leave immediately or I'll beat you too."

Sam just pulls on her arm once more, getting in the way of her hitting Dean. He was quick to end up on the floor with a horribly red mark blooming across his face. 

Dean was forced to watch as she turned her beating stick onto his little brother who he could no longer protect.