Confessions of a Teenage Alcoholic

Chapter 4

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"So how was your night?" Cole asks over the phone as I lay myself down in my old bed.

 Mum had gotten me from Jayden's at about half eleven, most of my friends actually went a little earlier but Lucy, Max and Jayden and I stayed behind a little bit, just chatting amongst ourselves.

"It was good. Very tiring." I say as I snuggle up, the wine from earlier making me sleepy.

"What did you do?" He asks and I smile.

"Well I personally drank a bottle of wine and tried to not glower at people."

"Ivy." He laughs. "And why would you be glowering?"

I sigh. "It was actually really nice being there, everyone was so much friendlier and warm than I remembered. And there were new boys so that was fun."

"You're breaking my heart."

"Cole." I laugh and he chuckles.

"I'm glad you had a good time. Are you going to elaborate on the whole glaring thing though?"

In bed I bring my hand to my face and rub my eyes. "It was harder than I expected, seeing him."

"Jackson?"

"Yeah."

"Hard how?" Cole asks and I honestly don't know.

"I guess It's just when I moved away, I was able to trick myself into believing I didn't care. Not trick myself exactly, it's just I moved on. I didn't have to see him."

"And have you not moved on then?" Cole says and I shake my head.

"It's not that. I don't want him or anything, it's just we were close yanoe? Before anything else, he was my best friend."

Cole coughs and I role my eyes, hoping he can sense it through the phone. 

"Best friend. Excuse me I hold that title." He says.

"Oh shhh, do you understand though?"

"How did he react to seeing you then? Was he angry?"

"No, just no emotion at all. Like not even blank I don't know how to explain it. He just didn't care. It was as if I was a stranger to him."

"A stranger?"

"Yeah. When I first saw him again I felt as if I was drowning under all the waves of words I wanted to say,  and then when I met his eyes, there was nothing there. He just acknowledged me as if I was a new member of the group."

"Fuck." He says and I smile. We always empathised with each other, if he was hurting then so was I, and vice versa.

"It's fine, it's easier this way. It's been a year, I'm just feeling like this because of the wine and the fact it was the first time."

"That might be true Nena. How tipsy are you?" He asks suggestively and I smile.

"Not tipsy enough for phone sex Cole. And plus haven't you just got home from Stacey's."

"I got home like five hours ago." He chuckles and I let my eyes drift closed.

"Still no."

"I didn't ask." He hums in amusement and I snuggle deeper into my covers. This bed was so much comfier than the one in St Patricks.

"You'd love this bed. It is so comfy." I say and he huffs.

"Don't get me thinking about you in bed." He chuckles and then says "Plus, I'm visiting soon anyway, we will test it out then."