built memories | a sequel

20 - Feeling

» really sorry for the wait but i've been writing a new fic and i focused more on that one this past week so i didn't get the patience to write this chapter, especially now with the holidays. Merry Christmas to everyone btw, i'm still not that late!! hope you all had a good day!

~*~

Goodbyes were never Louis' favourite cup of tea so maybe there are times that he doesn't go visit his family in Doncaster just because then he knows he will have to say goodbye to them, not knowing when he will come back.  

Especially this time. Today he is going back to London and he isn't saying goodbye alone, he isn't saying goodbye with Zayn next to him, who always cheers everyone up even though they're whispering encouraging things and hug each other, this time Louis is saying goodbye with Harry next to him and somehow everything gets ten times sadder than the usual.  

Louis knows his mother is holding herself and his father, even after what happened yesterday still hugs Harry and Louis as a goodbye. Zoe might have told him and Fiona what happened during dinner because they didn't comment on it, which was a relief for Harry – and even for Louis. 

Daisy keeps brushing her muzzle in Harry and Louis' ankles and it's like she knows. She understands everything, like when Harry left and Louis felt crushed down, she knew something was off. Now she remembers Harry's smell and acts like Louis. She wants to keep remembering it and doesn't want to let him go. 

Louis finishes saying goodbye to his brother and sister, who apparently is only going back to Manchester in two days, while Harry pets Daisy, trying to make her let him go in the nicest way.  

"You know... you can take her." Fiona's voice is heard, everyone looks at her giving her full attention. Harry stops petting the cat to look up at the woman who's smiling at him. Louis can't believe what he is listening to.   

"Fio –No..." Harry tries to speak, a bit taken by surprise with her words.  

"She was your idea, Harry." Louis' mother continues. "She was yours and Louis' in the first place. It makes no sense keeping her here with me now." What is stopping Louis to interject on this is the tender smile Fiona has on her face while she speaks and looks at Harry.  

"No, I shouldn't. This is her home."  

"You and Louis are her home." Fiona says softly and Louis looks shocked at her. "She can go back to be closer to you two." No she can't, Louis thinks, she can't because it's not like Louis and Harry are together 24/7 like they were. They don't live close to each other, taking Daisy now would be pointless, Harry having her on his flat back in London would be the same thing as she staying in Doncaster. 

Fiona tries to continue, Harry too astonished to answer yet, but Louis speaks. "Mom," he calls her in a warning. "please..." He says and she looks at him in an apologetic way. He knows she's trying to help, maybe she thinks this would be the best but Louis has a feeling that it wouldn't. They can't force these type of things now, they're starting from the beginning, they can't get attached to things from the past. "I'm just going to bring my suitcase from upstairs. Give me a minute." Harry looks at Louis, probably waiting for him to say something, to look at him, but that doesn't happen.  

Louis walks upstairs to his room. The mattress that once was on the floor, for Harry to sleep, is now stood up against the wall, Louis' bed is also made, the blinds from the window are only half opened and Louis looks around and it looks like the same it did when he came here for Christmas. Sad, lonely and... cold. It's like Harry was never here. 

Louis sighs, he can't deny it, he is still so attached to the past even though he knows he can't do anything to bring it back. He can't, it's a fact, for much they fight for it, things will never be like they were. On one hand it's good because they grew up and maybe they can turn out to make things better this time, on the other hand, it's devastating.