HIRAETH

Thirteen

I rolled over and felt a warm body next to me. My eyes slowly opened to see Aurelia sleeping soundly next me.

After we got home from the court house, Sebastian had sat Aurelia down and explained what had happened with Alexia and that she may not see her very much. I did my best help him when he couldn't find the right words to explain it to her. She finally seemed to understand and honestly, she didn't seem to care. Her biggest concern was what we were eating for dinner.

Sebastian had wondered all night if she was actually okay and I told him that her world wasn't really changing that much. Her mom never cared to see her very much anyway and I told Sebastian that she probably wouldn't notice anything was different.

After we had dinner, Aurelia had asked if she could sleep at my apartment and Sebastian agreed. I offered for him to come too if he did't want to be alone, but he declined saying he had to be up early for work anyway. I knew his movie would be wrapping up soon for the holidays. Thanksgiving was only a few days away and I was beginning to wonder if I should go home for it.

My family and I didn't agree very well at times and I knew I would miss Aurelia and Sebastian.

Speaking of Aurelia, she rolled over and wrapped her hand around my arm, nuzzling her head into it. I couldn't help but smile at her.

After finding out about the man at the park, Sebastian and I had a long discussion about Aurelia's need for therapy. Not just because of the divorce, but also because of the man. I wanted to make sure she would have a chance to heal mentally. Sebastian also shared my concern and agreed that we would begin looking into childhood therapists.

I had grown to love this little girl more than I could understand, or even begin to explain. She  definitely had me wrapped around her finger.

The thought of love brought back the memory of Sebastian and I in the kitchen just the night before last. When we had gotten so caught up in each other. I had thought that I may be in love with him.

Was I?

I had been in love before, obviously. It had just been so long since I had felt like that for a man that I forgot what it felt like.

Sebastian is every bit of the man that Nathan was. Kind, caring, attentive. They would've been best friends had life happened differently.

I remember early in my relationship with Nathan when I had wondered if I was in love with him. We spent years as best friends before realizing that we loved each other. Everything that happened after that realization was pure bliss until he fell sick. When he passed, I didn't know if I would ever feel that for anyone again. I had certainly hoped that if I came out of the sadness and depression I would find someone that could at least be a friend if nothing else. I didn't need to find another love, I thought I had lost the only man I could ever be in love with.

Sebastian has made me question that multiple times.

I smile as I think of all of our stolen moments. How devoted we are to protecting Aurelia.

And as the sleeping girl next to me begins to open her eyes and wake up, I see the blue color that she inherited from her father and I realize I do love him.

I love him.

I love Sebastian.

I love how kind he is, how willing he is to do whats best for his daughter, even if it terrifies him. I love how he smiles, how his eyes shine and he squeezes them shut when he laughs hard. I love the way he speaks Romanian with his daughter to keep her in touch with her heritage. I love his voice, his mind, and I love his daughter.