Tinder - Jenlisa (English version)

33

Lisa POV

I spend the whole concert dancing and shouting. I know the whole choreography of all the songs and I show it to Jennie who laughs. The Magnum's live performance is brutal. They sound pretty much the same as on the EP and they don't let up for a second even though they must be exhausted. I could get used to this. If my job from now on involves working with one of my favourite bands of the moment, while having a thing with a gorgeous and amazing girl who is also my boss, then not so bad.

When the concert was over we spent a long time talking with Jungkook and the girls and then we went to dinner with him and Taehyun. The girls didn't come, they were tired and had to get up early because they had an interview in the morning. Jennie and I didn't stay too long either because we were also getting up early to take the plane back to Korea. Although I hate the idea of going home, I miss Jisoo and my cats.

Jungkook is not bad. Yesterday he seemed cocky to me because he is a successful guy and he speaks with a lot of self-confidence. Confidence is something I admire in people, because it gives an image to others that makes them see you as bigger than they are and the best thing about it is that no one can tell if it's real or fake. I would bet that Jungkook's is real. A guy with so much money and success from New York's elite has no reason to fake it.

Taehyun on the other hand is more shy and is always serious. He is a kind and nice boy, though. He is almost always quiet, but when he speaks, it is to offer help to others. I guess that's his role. I wonder if Jennie sees me that way, somehow. Or saw me. As someone who is there to serve her. I'm sure she did.

When we finished dinner the guys took us back to the hotel. They were very insistent that they weren't going to let us take a taxi when they could have taken us, so in the end we accepted. My head hasn't stopped wandering since the Magnum concert. It's like I had so much hype and it's all over that now I feel a bit empty, or maybe I'm just reconnecting with the reality I've been ignoring for so many hours, and I can't be with Jennie if I lie to her, because it's not right.

My idea of Jeongyeon ghosting her and disappearing and then explaining to her in a long time like it's nothing, it's starting not to sit well with me at all. I can see that it's bullshit. But the idea of telling her now, or when we get back, is even shittier. Whatever I do is unfair to her. Because I've done things wrong and now either I'm forcing her to make a decision that I'm sure she doesn't want to make, or I've had her fooled from day one, when it's precisely because I fooled her before that I have this problem. Fooling, fooling, fooling. At what point did I become like that?

JENNIE: Are you okay?

LISA: What?

She looks at me worried.

JENNIE: Are you okay, you've barely spoken all night.

LISA: Yeah, I was thinking...

'Agh.'

Jennie looks at me as if she expects me to finish the sentence, but I don't. My head is spinning, looking for an excuse.

JENNIE: About what?

LISA: Hmm... that I don't want to go home.

She smiles at me in relief.

JENNIE: Don't you want to see Jisoo? Or your cats?

LISA: Of course I do.

JENNIE: It's kind of the same for me. Being here is like a break, isn't it?

It's not the same for us, but I agree with her.

JENNIE: It's kind of like a mini holiday for me, I haven't had a break for like... years?

LISA: You shouldn't work so hard.

JENNIE: I hear that a lot.

She laughs like it's a joke or something funny. It isn't.

LISA: I'm serious. In the long run it's going to end up affecting you to work so much without any rest.

She looks at me seriously.

JENNIE: I know, I wanted to take some of the heat off.

We get to her room. We take off our coats and Jennie prepares drinks.

JENNIE: I don't want to talk about work.

LISA: Neither do I.

JENNIE: Then come.

She beckons me to come closer to her. When I reach her I go to kiss her but Jennie pulls away smiling and hands me the drink.

JENNIE: If you kiss me now I won't be able to stop and I want to drink some more.

LISA: Oh, wow...

I giggle and feel warmth in my cheeks remembering the things we did last night. I take a drink.

JENNIE: How eloquent you seem...

LISA: I know you only said that to make me nervous.

JENNIE: You think so?

I tease her a little.

LISA: I think...

JENNIE: Did I make you nervous?

LISA: Yes, I won't deny it.

We laugh.

JENNIE: You're really not what I thought you were.

LISA: Oh. I hope I'm better than that.

JENNIE: Well... -she pretends to hesitate because she's an idiot- I don't know.

I smile and grimace because I know I can't possibly be any worse than she thought I was a month ago.

LISA: What am I like, then? Apart from awesome at sex, of course.

I look at her with a sideways grin and a cool face, but she doesn't seem to flinch, sips from her drink and looks at me amused.

JENNIE: Hmmmm. You're interesting.

LISA: You didn't think I was before?

JENNIE: Exactly.

LISA: Oh...

I wince and we laugh.

JENNIE: But you really are awesome at sex.

I choke on my drink. Fucking hell. Okay. I started this game but I don't have the capacity to play along.

LISA: You're fine too.

She looks up at me smiling with her drink in her hand. I don't know what to say to her because I'm a little caught up looking into her eyes.

JENNIE: I'm glad you think so.

LISA: I'm glad you're not what I thought you were, too.

Jennie looks at me pretending to be upset.

JENNIE: Really, should I be offended?

I laugh.

LISA: You should kiss me. Now.

She smiles and moves closer to me.

JENNIE: Are you telling me what to do?

LISA: Are you telling me you don't want to do it?

JENNIE: Did you answer my question with another question?

LISA: Are you going to kiss me for once?

Jennie smiles. She puts her hand on my neck and looks at me like I'm an idiot and she loves it and kisses me as if the whole night was just a preamble to this kiss, as if we haven't done it for days.