Separately Together

Chapter Twenty-Two: 2/2

Even if I have to wash my sheets every night. My hand would be the only hand touching my cock for a long time because I knew I could go through with the images in my head, nor could I preform them with anyone else when all I can think about is her.

I turn away from her and notice the smell of breakfast coming from the kitchen and the sound of some music coming from speakers. I walk in there and see Dixon standing in front of the oven scrambling eggs. "Ohh I want to help. I'll make muffins." Maddie swerves around me to start grabbing the ingredients and I stand there looking at them working in sync with each other.

"Anything I can do?" I ask feeling a little off as I watch them cook breakfast together. I should be doing something instead of just standing around while they do all the work.

"Ha, yeah the dishes." Dixon teases me because when I was younger I caused a fire to start on the stove and our mom had to buy a new one, she slapped me that night. Dixon doesn't know that part, I did my best to hide those parts from her. The part about her refusing to cook her anything because she was high as a kite, how she would leave Dixon alone and when I got home, I would find her curled up under her cover asleep, tears streaming down her face. How the only reason I even came home at all was because of her. She never hit Dixon, I made sure of it but she use to beat the shit out of me.

It would have been better if she had always been a piece of crap mother but she use to be a good one, she use to be a soccer mom, fussing over me when I was little and I had to watch her turn into the monster she is today because of drugs.

Dixon doesn't remember her good side she was too young to pick up too much of it.

"You'll never let me live that down will you?" I ask with a huff as I sit down at the bar watching them work.

Dixon had grew up so much that it was saddening. In the way that I had missed so much of her life but I didn't want to dwell on the fact that she was a foot taller now or the at fact that she had been through some things I don't want to know about. I could see in her eyes she was barely holding together.

I was going to get her a therapist, because I'm grown now, I know exactly what unsolved traumas do to you in the long run.

Trust issues

Commitment problems

Self Worth deflections

She wasn't going to have to expire e this because I was going to make sure she got to heal properly. I might couldn't have stopped the things she's went through but I can damn sure make sure it doesn't affect her overall.

Dixon and Maddie do this hip bump thing and I can't stop the smile that spreads across my face. Maddie was succeeding. She was giving me a life I craved back and today I was going to try to fix my relationship with Finnic, I wanted no tension between the four of us when the baby came which Liz was getting close to having.

I didn't want the stress of all of this on them in such a special moment in their life's and I also didn't want to miss out on watching the little shit grow up. No way was I missing out of seeing Liz and Finnic Junior running around.

I feel bad about what ai said to Finnic even if it was the truth. I willing took the blame off of him, she shouldn't get blame for that. The only person to blame for Dixon ending up in the foster care system is our mother, he shouldn't hold that on himself. I was going to make it a point to apologize for what I said and reassure him that that wasn't on him, he didn't ask me to take the blame for, he never did I just always did it anyways because Finnic had everything to look froward to while I didn't have anything going for me. Sure, there was football, but no one was in the stands for me but ...

I smile a gentle smile but Maddie. I remember now she use to wear my number to all of the games; she told Finnic it was because he had mom, but I didn't have anyone there.

God how did I miss all of those signs so many years ago, of course I would have put a stop to the crush she wasn't much more than a kid, maybe it was for the better I didn't find out.

She been there rooting for me this whole time and I didn't even really notice it until she promised to stay and then getting Dixon back. She was everything I could ever need or want but she was so far away that I wouldn't even know where to begin.

I want the world for her, but she's determined the only way she can give the world to me is by being here and I fucking love it. I love that she isn't ready to flee and save herself, without me. I guess there is a selfish bone in my body after all. I could make her leave, but I won't. It would be hard enough letting her leave on her own account I could never force myself to make her go if she wanted to stay.

So as long as she was content here, here is where she would stay. With me, with in arms distance and safe. As safe as I could ever keep her even if it wasn't as safe as she would be out of this town.

A place is put before me on the bar before they come sit down beside me and I look down at the breakfast they fixed.

The muffins sweet aroma feeling the kitchen making the whole room smell like Maddie.

I look at my two girls and I can't help the feeling of completion that comes over me. I had everything I would ever need or want right here at this bar.

they were my everything.

They were my reason to live but now that they were here I was struck with the jolt of realization at exactly what I had done. It wasn't like I could just take the brand off of my skin. It and all of its meaning was there for the rest of my life, and I regret getting it.

Now that it's there Dixon and Maddie would never be truly safe with me but what other choice did, we have? We didn't have a way around this I would have to do the best I could at keeping The Voiceless the strongest gang around here, that way no one even looks in their direction.

That was the only course I could go down even if that leads me to being like the man that I despise most in this world, my father.

-.-.-.-.-
Don't forget to vote and comment. Thank you❤️