Hidden

Chapter 16

Valeriana's pov

I've been home for two days. I did a lot of sleeping and staring at the ceiling. My brothers bring in food. A different brother each time but I haven't eaten anything. I couldn't because what Alice said got to me. My mother wasn't there. She didn't teach me shit. She didn't love me. Didn't care I was home alone at five years old starving. Didn't care when she was beating me. It was like I was stuck in the past. Everything she ever did to me was running through my mind whether I was awake or sleeping. I couldn't eat because I was brought back to us not having food. Even though I knew there was food right next to me I couldn't turn around and eat it.

My dad and papà came and visited me. My brothers thought it was what I needed but I wouldn't talk to them or look at them. They stayed with me though and didn't leave until I fell asleep. My ears pick up on the sound of someone entering my room. It was Matteo. I've learned the sound of each of my brothers footsteps and can now tell who was walking in.

"You gotta start eating, V," Matteo says worriedly. My eyes close. "You shouldn't act this way to what Alice said. It can't be true. Don't let her affect you. You're worrying us," Matteo says quietly. My stomach tightened. It can't be true. How wrong that statement was.

"Matteo, leave her alone," Aurelio says while going to pass the room.

"She was right, Matteo," I muttered, my voice breaking towards the end. Aurelio took a few steps back. He didn't enter the room just stayed by the door.

"What do you mean she was right?" Matteo asked. I push myself up and face two of my brothers. I lean my back against the wall.

"She was right. Mother wasn't there. Since I was 5. She would leave. Weeks at a time. There would be no food at the house and she would still be gone. As if I wasn't at home starving and dirty with no power. My dad and papà were my neighbors. They found out as I got older and I would stay with them. When mother was home I would wish she stayed away. It was better when she was gone. She would beat me if I didn't do what she asked," I mutter. My eyes land on my arm with the scar.

"This scar right here... She was gone for four months. I saw lights on at home. So I had to go back or the punishment would be worse. She had an older guy with her. I didn't care, she had guests over before. This time it was different. He was there for me. He was paying mother for a night with me. I refused and she attacked me. She left me bleeding on the floor to sleep with the guy herself. When they were done they walked over top of my body to leave the house. My dad and papà found me later that night. She didn't return until a few months after that. So her dying did affect me but not the way you all think it did. I'm fucking glad she's dead. I don't have to see that woman again. I don't have to worry about when she will return again," I say. I take a deep breath before smiling.

"She's gone, I can relax now," I say and I could feel the calmness in my words because it was true. I didn't have to worry anymore.

"You're distancing yourself from us because of this?" Matteo asked sadly.

"I know it's not your guys fault but my whole life the only family I had was my mother and she hurt me for years. She hurt me until I couldn't continue to love her. I know you guys won't do that because you guys are about family. You have family meals, sunday you all play games before bed or have a small bonfire out back. On Wednesdays Aurelio, you try to hear everyone tell you about their week so far. I just can't help but think you can hurt me like she did because that's how it was my whole life. I'm trying, but it will take time, guys," I mutter. I stand up from the bed.

"I'm gonna be in the shower," I mutter.

"Eat something first," Aurelio says. I look at the plate Matteo brought in. It was a peanut butter and strawberry jelly sandwich. It was cut in half so there were two long triangles. A small smile appeared on my face as I grabbed a half of the sandwich. I walk towards the bathroom.

"You're eating in the bathroom?" Matteo asked. I take a bite of the sandwich and nod before shutting the door behind me. I look down at the sandwich again. I only ate sandwiches if they were cut like that. My dads must have told them. I finish the sandwich before I get into the shower.

Once I was showered, my teeth brushed, I walked out of my bathroom and went to my closet. I changed into sweatpants and a baggy shirt. The sweatpants hugged my legs. My hair was put in two french braids. I grab my phone and scan over my contacts. I stop on Miss Wells' number. She had it on top of the syllabus she gave out for the class. It was most likely for our parents or guardians but I figured it would be useful. I press the call button. It takes a few seconds before she answers the phone.

"Hello?" she answered.

"Hey, Miss Wells, It's Valeriana. I hope you weren't busy and that it's ok for me to call. I was just wondering if I could maybe take Wiggles on a walk? It's ok if I can't," I mutter.

"Hey, Valeriana. I'm sure Wiggles would like that. I'll see you soon," she says.

"Bye," I mutter before hanging up. I do a little happy dance. When I'm done I leave my room and jog down the stairs. All my brothers' eyes were on me as they watched me. I head towards the door.