my broken smile - Wenclair Fanfiction

Chapter 12: Distance Rationalization

(enid pov)
I sigh as I sit down next to Yoko. Wednesday would've eaten with us today, but she is gone. Left without saying goodbye. Transferred out of our shared classes. In a new room on the other side of campus. I shouldn't care. I barely liked her. My stomach looks over as I see her look this way on the other side of the courtyard. But she sits down on the ground, turning away. I stare at my hands, sitting on the table. Yoko puts a hand on my shoulder, understanding without the need for words. I smile at her weakly, and she squeezes, letting me breathe in the pressure. She turns back to Divina, and I turn back to the table, not looking at the girl with braids.

When I glance back she is gone, Ajax laughing with Xavier where she was standing. My stomach curdles, and I hurry to my next class. I barely even liked Wednesday Addams.

I wake up in Wednesday's bed alone. She must be in the bathroom, I think, rolling over. Then I see her desk. The typewriter is gone. I sit up, and look around. All of her stuff is gone. I panic. I rummage through all her drawers. Empty. Fucking empty. I chuckle slightly at the absurdity, and sink to the floor laughing turning hysterical, chuckles turning to sobs. Where did she go? Did I go too far? What did I do?

Eventually I stop crying. I just stare. At the empty desk. That's how I know she is going. I lie there. I rationalize. This is for the best. Our anomaly could only last so long. She isn't in class. She isn't at lunch. Nobody has seen her, or nobody tells me.

We haven't spoken since.

(wednesday pov)
"You did what?" Thing signs angrily when he wakes up. I sigh. I hadn't wanted to trap him when I left, but I knew he would fight me. He doesn't appreciate this response. "Did you leave a note?" I look away, and shake my head. "That's awful! You know Enid has been struggling! You just abandoned her?" I flinch at the word choice, but hold my ground. "What made you think this was a good idea?" He signs, piling it on.

"I would have hurt her!" I scream.

"You already did! With this!" He retorts.

"Don't you think I know that?" My voice cracks. Thing moves back, unused to my voice showing raw emotion. "I know I hurt her. But she will bounce back from this. She'll be fine. I couldn't let it keep going." I sigh. "She was stressed about me. Her nightmares were about me. Her scars are because of me. I couldn't let it keep going." I crumple, as if stabbed. "I won't get hurt either, this way." I whisper, sitting on the floor in my new dorm, all alone. No color. I never thought that would be a bad thing. "What do you call this?" Thing responds, turning and leaving me. Alone. I always knew it would be this way. I never knew I could feel this... much.

(thing pov)
Wednesday is destroying herself. And there is nothing I can do. I just have to hope she figures it out before it is too late. If it isn't already. I glance back sadly at the girl broken on the floor.

(enid pov)
Wednesday's child is full of woe. Thursday's child has far to go. But Thursday's child is also full of woe when Wednesday's child abandons them. I sigh. This is not constructive thinking, this is moping about that stupid roommate who left without saying goodbye. I stand up, and walk back to my bed. Not Wednesday's. No. Not the empty bed where nobody ever slept. Nobody who matters anyway. I sigh. Thing scurries under the door. I look over at him. A loud bang on the other side. Thing scurries back out. Wednesday. I stand, running, but I open the door and the hall is empty. Tears work their way down my face, carving paths through the concealer on my scars and staining my sweater. I slam the door, curling into a ball against it. What have I become?

No. This is better. It would have only hurt to see Wednesday. She left me, and I barely even liked her. This is fine.

(wednesday pov)
I almost kill Thing. Not even in a threatening way, I just accidentally cut off his circulation while we run back to my actual room. He 'forgot.' I hear Enid open the door as I round the stairway, and I sigh in both relief, and out of sadness. This is for the best, even if I hate it and miss her desperately. But no. Love is not for me. It would be a bad idea. I'd been hugging too much. This will fade.

I stop making physical contact. I stop talking to people beyond the necessary words. My grades fall, but I don't care. I was always smart, but it doesn't matter anymore. After a couple months, though, I discover that studying is a great way to distract yourself, so I quickly surpass Bianca as top of my class. Then I learn that I have to talk to people, so I figure out how to stay a close second.

I devote most of my attention to never bumping into the werewolf. She doesn't seem to care, though. She is probably happy. I haven't spoken to her. My only remaining contact is Eugene, and we interact wordlessly. I come to the bees. I work with the bees. He works with the bees. Periodically, he touches my shoulder to remind me he cares. I do not react. I appreciate the gesture, secretly. He knows it. That is all the contact I need. It is nice. And I don't need Enid. I don't. I don't. I don't. Why would I? I have myself. I'm very interesting. I sigh. My fake ego isn't working today.

(enid pov)
Another 2 weeks go by. "Happy birthday to this," I murmur on the anniversary. A month has passed since Wednesday left me. She just left. My stomach hasn't settled. My breath hasn't steadied. I feel like I am still in shock, still can't see the truth of what happened. But it did. Wednesday's empty side of the room, untouched, glares at me. I hiss at it, wanting so badly to destroy it but unable to get rid of the memories. I sigh, and text Yoko. "Do you want to go out tomorrow night?" My phone dings. "Yes! You need this, girl. I know the perfect café in town! 💗"

(wednesday pov)
A month. I sigh, and lie down, ready for the same nightmare.

Enid. Always Enid. I sigh, preparing for the dream. "Why did you leave me?" Enid asks. "Just like us," Esme and Viper croon. "Destined to be alone," Tyler whispers. I roll my eyes. "Try a different tactic," I tell the figments. "This is the same dream as the past month."

The scene morphs. "Goody."

"What are you doing, Wednesday?"

"What do you mean?" I ask, backing away. "Why do you want to be alone?"

"You said I had to be... this is for the best."

"For who?"

"Me, Enid, everyone."

Enid appears as I say her name. "She doesn't look very happy," Goody points at the werewolf. I stare at the picture. Enid wakes up and finds me gone. She goes through her days. "Notice anything?" Goody asks. I stare, unable to speak. She. Isn't. Smiling. At all. "Is that... because of me?" I choke, staring at the image. It changes. Enid's smile as she runs to hug me. Enid's grin as I tell her that 'Thing' missed her. All that she has shared with me. And I just broke it.

The image changes again. To me. As a child. With my signature glare. Me meeting Enid. The glare softens into a soft smile. Then it, too, breaks. But not into another glare. Into nothing. The image fades. Enid again. "Nonononono!" She screams, backing away from an unseen foe. She scrambles into a sign. A café in Jericho. "I don't... recognize that." I murmur. Goody shakes her head. "This isn't a memory. This is a vision." I turn to her, not bothering to hide the fear from my face. "What are you going to do, Wednesday?" Goody echoes, fading away.

The dream fades away, and I am left alone again. 

A/N: Thank you so much for reading this! I can't believe I've gotten this far. This is the craziest thing to ever happen to me. I love you so much. Hope you enjoy! Plenty more drama is coming your way >:)

PS: Would anyone want to see the playlist I use to write this, or would that be dumb?