Prodigal Girl

Chapter 7:Rayanne

A week passes by with the same things going on. Playing in the game room, swimming, and sulking. Actually, a lot of sulking. My family has started wondering what's gotten into me although they already know.

Today is Monday. We went to church yesterday and I learned more about shining for Jesus. I think I'm a bit foggy, spiritually. Ever since that big "NO" for New York in my face, I haven't been shining very well. I know I should try more. But I just can't help it. I wanna go. Even if that means going by myself. I've just got to do it.

Or maybe I shouldn't. I don't even have the money to last me one day in New York. But I have a lot of money in my bank account savings for college. Why does a rich family have savings for their kids' colleges when they're already rich? Well, my parents want us to learn to save and they want to be safe.

My conscience says no, don't go. My mind says yes. Ugh. I have no idea what to do. Go to New York, or stay and sulk. I think we'd all agree that I'd be better not sulking. I haven't even gotten any temper tantrums for the past week. New record.

To distract my thoughts, I sit in my library and read. I don't want anyone coming in and try to cheer me up. If someone does come in, I'm going.

Or not. Ugh. I'm not concentrating on my book. I close it. This isn't helping. I get up and walk over to where Pansy's sleeping. I nudge her. She opens one eye and looks at me. "Do you think I should go to New York?" I ask her. She shakes her head. It's like she actually understands me. Well, maybe she does. I sigh.

I slump against the wall. I just sit there and think of a plan. A knock comes at my door.

"Who is it?" I ask with a dull voice. "It's Rachel." She says pushing the door open. "What do you want?" I ask with a grumble. "Oh, well I'm sorry. I didn't know that you get mad at every person who comes in and tries to cheer you up." She says looking at me with worried eyes and a serious expression. "Sorry." I mumble.

"Are you planning something?" She asks me. "What?" I ask in surprise. "Your eyebrows are furrowed and your face is all serious and a bit dreamy. Your planning something aren't you?" She repeats sitting beside me. I look away. "Mmhmm. Thought so." She says sadly. "Please be careful. And always remember that we love you. And, don't do anything crazy." She says. We sit in silence.

"I think I've got to sleep now." I say slowly. Rachel gets up and looks at me. She hugs me. "I love you Rayanne. Please don't-" she stops. "Just do what's right. Sometimes that means bearing pain." She says walking out the door without another glance at me. I look at her and see her sad face.

She turns around. "Why do you have to do this?" She asks. I look at her for a while and hold her gaze. "People at school love me and my friends. We have the lives they want. And they said we're good examples. But now, they think I'm lame because I don't travel and I can't because I'm not allowed. They think my parents, our family, is strict. And, mom and dad aren't. At least not always. I-" I stop.

Rachel nods. "Okay. I understand. But when you're done with this scheme of yours, I hope you learn a lesson. And don't worry. I won't tell anyone. I can't since you're not telling me your plan anyway." She says with a small sad smile as she walks to her room. I just stand there. Rachel understands why. She said I'd even learn something.

Maybe I shouldn't do this. But I'm rich. I'm blessed. I might even get smarter and stronger emotionally, physically, and mentally. I don't know, but I can't stand this anymore.