A Whole New World...Or Possibly Life

I'm Leaving

This right here is what I was trying profusely to avoid.  Being a clingy, dependent who wanted Chris Evans to myself in some capacity.  Note to self, alcohol should be limited when I'm around Chris because it acts as a hammer to my concrete wall.  That wall's barbed wire and electric fence needed to be turned up a notch.  Knowing this is why it is so much easier to be Scott's friend, because there wasn't a feeling of competition.  Not that I wanted anything to become of Chris and I, so I kept reminding myself, with Scott I knew girls weren't his thing.  I enjoyed my flirty banter with Chris and if he had a girlfriend it would have to lessen.  Scott and I didn't have the flirty banter so that feeling wasn't there. 

So, in short, note to self, I was going to back away a little.  Or at least try my best to do so.  It would be hard but I would have to regroup and when Chris was here, the wall would have to be stronger so instances like this would bounce off and I'd just go with the flow. It was getting harder, the closer I was getting to Chris, to hold back stronger feelings than friendship. Then, seeing how much it irritated me that I had competition for his attention, I knew it would be a challenge.

I texted an Uber the minute I stepped out the door.  Pretty much, as I was walking through it, actually.  Scott was supposed to come stay with me tonight because we thought we would be getting in late and he didn't want to disturb his mom.  Texting him a quick message that I was leaving and had an uber coming, I let him know he didn't have to leave now if he didn't want to but I wasn't feeling well.  As I stared up at the glowing moon and glistening stars, I heard the door to the pool hall close.  Wiping my eyes and not looking back towards the door, I spoke up, "I'm okay Scotty, I just think I got overheated with the crowd and then drinking some...."

"You okay?  What's going on, Feisty? You jerked away so fast..."

Twirling around, still kind of clumsy, but much less foggy, I took in a sudden gulp of breath.  Definitely NOT Scott, this was definitely Chris.  The way the moon was shining on his face made his eyes glitter but look sad all at the same time.  His baseball hat turned backwards and his jeans hanging just right, his tight, light blue tee shirt straining in just the right places, it seemed his biceps may pop the seams. He had bulked up yet again for another role and he looked so good it could make a person drool.  How this man had such a tiny waist and could build this much upper body muscle so fast was extraordinary.  The shirt hanging only low enough to cover the tip top of his jeans so his belt could still show. When he had raised his arms throughout the night for this or that, his underwear band would show just a enough to warrant a stare ... NO, STOP THAT! STOP IT RIGHT NOW! This is your friend Chrissy!  Christopher Robert!  Not the gorgeous, Chris freaking Evans, Captain flipping America, the First fucking Avenger! And he was just acting like an ass!

"I'm fine.  I just got over heated and needed a minute."  I turned back around so my back was facing him again. Hearing the gravel under his feet as he walked up to me sent chills up my body, anticipating him stepping closer to me. All of a sudden he wrapped his arms around my shoulders from behind, bringing them together in the front, clasping his hands as the lock to his embrace, before speaking.

"How are you over heated when you are shivering. You need to come back inside from the night air unless you want me to stay out here like this and keep you warm."

As nice as his embrace felt, I tried to shrug out of it, making my voice shake, but it was louder than I meant for it to have been.  "Don't tell me what I need to do Chris. Run back in there and tell those girls what to do so they can fall at your feet and make heart eyes after you as they undress you in their mind. Better yet, I could go grab one for you and I bet you $1000 she would let you do more than hold her like this and do whatever your little heart desires in order to warm her up. I'm sure if you told any of them to jump, they would probably ask you how high?"