Serene Of The Sea

13. Weaver

I'm dying.
It was simply a fact that drifted through my mind as I drifted to the bottom of the tank.
Close your eyes. It'll be over soon. Pain is only in the mind.
My killers no longer cared about me, they had taken what they wanted. The pain had reached its peak, there's nothing more they could do to torture me. I let the dark mist wrap around my mind.
Free me from this place.
I willed with all my heart, reaching out for some form of comfort.
I was met with a cold aura that stood out from the rest. He was here, I knew it before I opened my eyes to him. His predatory gaze held mine, white teeth flashing, surrounded by mer-kind.
I was too far gone to fear him. He placed his hand on the glass, beckoning me.
I wanted to close my eyes, but he wouldn't let me. Dax's lips moved, curling back with glee, You don't belong.

Eyes snapping open, I found I couldn't see anything. Then I remembered I was under the sheets. I groaned, rubbing my eyes with more force than necessary.
I wasn't ready to face the world yet, so I stayed under the safety of the blankets, even though it was sweltering hot. The darkness allowed me to transport myself elsewhere. To pretend that no one could find me. But even that couldn't block out the suffocating thoughts. I curled in foetal position, wrapping my arms around my knees.
Don't think.
Don't think.
I could hear someone coming up the walkway, only by the rattling of a tray, because everyone around here was so light on their feet.
I just wanted to be left alone, so I lay still, pretending to sleep, hoping that Anahi would let me rest.
The sound of the curtain shifting told me she had entered. The next sound was the tray being placed next to the bed, followed by the depression of the mattress as she sat down.
There was a drawn out pause, "I know you're awake," Kai's voice muffled through the sheets.
I breathed out, knowing I was going to have to face him as I pushed the blanket off my face. Or he wouldn't leave me alone.
I was glad, if anyone was going to force their presence on me, that it was him.
His cooling eyes held mine, "Hey," He whispered, pushing a tendril of hair off my face, leaving his cool hand on my cheek.
"Hey." I answered numbly, feeling heat building up behind my eyes again.
Why couldn't I hate him? It would make this all so much easier.
"You need to eat," His heavy dark hair fell on his face as he stared down at me, worry sitting firmly on his brow, liquid blue eyes mesmerizing.
"I'm not hungry."
I just want..........what do I want? I didn't even know.
Kai sighed, pushing his hair back as he does when he's stressed, "Don't be stubborn."
His mouth lifted in a small smile, though it didn't quite reach his eyes.
Damn you Kai.
I sat up, allowing him to hand me the bowl as I threw my best pout.
It was again filled with some strangely coloured food, "Do you people ever eat solids? Seriously," I groaned, though it didn't quite hit my usual passive aggressive standards. I began to eat the soupy purple paste.
Kai laughed, "There she is. Thought I'd lost you for a second there. And yes, we love our soups."
I rolled my eyes at his sarcastic tone. I had been hungry, but it was nothing compared to the ache in my chest, constantly reminding me of today's events. I emptied the bowl of its contents, allowing Kai to put it on the floor for me. I wrapped the blankets closer to my chest, not knowing what to say as he turned back.
"I'm sorry," We both spoke in unison.
Fumbling over each others apologies, "I'm sorry I hurt all those people. And for taking it out on you," My words were rushed, but I knew he caught them.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you I was leaving for the day. I'm also sorry for leaving you with my idiot roommates. Even Anahi admitted to giving you grief earlier, which caused you to go with blow-fish one and two. For which she blames herself. Alvor and Riley don't think. When they go to the arena, their minds don't comprehend what they are actually watching. But they have both agreed never to go again, especially after experiencing it first hand. I think alot of people will think twice about going back now. Forgive me?" He breathed it all out. Looking to me for my answer.
"There's nothing to forgive you for," I lay back on the puffy pillows as the skystones shifted to silver. Even though I had slept, my eyelids felt like lead. Blood rushed through my ears causing a high pitched ringing.
"Thank you for understanding. I can go now if you want to sleep," He stood from the mattress to give me some space.
But I caught his arm without thinking, "Please stay," My voice cracked pathetically as I said it, not wanting to be left alone with my thoughts.
I couldn't handle myself anymore. Before Kai, my own company was the goal. My own company was safety. Now it filled me with unwavering unease.
Kai stood there for a moment, before sliding in next to me, wrapping me in his solid arms. I placed my head on his chest and closed my eyes, listening to his warm steady heartbeat through his shirt, it was very soothing as my head rose and fell with his breath. His ocean like scent comforted my thoughts.
"You were very brave," His voice rumbled on my cheek after a while, "To stay with the whale I mean. I can't even imagine what you went through."
I tensed at the memory.
Knowingly, he waited until I calmed, "I just wanted you to know. I'll help you find someone to help you with your powers, and I'll do what I can to make things right," He placed a feather light kiss on my hair. I could still feel it tingling long after he'd stopped.
I shuffled my position to look up into his crystal eyes, "I don't think it was bravery, I was terrified."
Kai pulled me closer at the thought.
You shouldn't be enjoying this. Selfish.
My snide conscious whispered.
"If you weren't afraid, it wouldn't have been bravery," He uttered softly, closing his eyes.
I didn't sleep for a long time, fearing the dreams I knew would come. Focusing on his steadying heartbeat and listening to his deepening breaths, I awaited the nightmares.