Dosage of Serotonin

Chapter 32

Chapter 32

I sipped my drink while staring at the snowfall on the glass pane beside me. I smiled at its beauty. Nasa coffee shop ako malapit sa apartment habang hinihintay ang pagdating ng mga kasamahan ko sa church. May outdoor meeting kasi kami para sa nalalapit na Christmas party.

Matapos mabasa ang devotion notebook ni Calix, mayroong mga naiwang tanong sa puso ko. I didn't understand before why Calix trusted Him so much. Na kahit masakit na, imbis na magalit sa mismong nakagawa sa kanya ng kasalanan, lumapit siya sa Kanya at nanalangin.

It piqued my curiosity. Kaya naman pagdating ko rito ay agad akong naghanap ng churches. Sa unang pag-attend, hindi ko alam kung bakit napaiyak na agad ako sa pagtugtog ng isang Christian song. Kahit ang mismong mensahe noong araw na 'yon ay parang ginawa para sa akin.

But along with the spiritual guidance, nagpa-counsel din ako sa isang psychiatrist dito. I was aware that my mental health was declining as a result of my numerous suicidal ideas. Thankfully, I wasn't diagnosed with any mental disability. Sinabihan lang ako na magpa-counsel from time to time para ma-monitor ako. I did it for almost six months.

Doon pa rin pumapasok na kapag ang problema ay psychological, ang approach sa solusyon ay psychological din. If someone has a mental disorder, they must consult a mental health professional. If the concern is physical, they should see a physician.

Mental disorders were not caused by a lack of faith. Walang correlation ang dalawang iyon. Even a pastor whose belief was established could be diagnosed with that. Tulad ng physical illnesses, walang exempted dito. Walang pinipili. The spiritual faith would only be used as a coping tool, not a treatment or cure.

"Nice scarf," putol ni Laurice sa pag-iisip ko. Isa siya sa mga leaders sa church.

I smiled before holding onto my favorite beige knitted scarf. Sumulyap ako sa likuran niya at nakita kong umupo na ang lampas sampung members na hinihintay ko.

Kasama ko sa meeting dahil isa ako sa counselors. I offered free counseling sessions to the members of our church. Minsan, kapag may free time ay nagtuturo ako sa Sunday School. It was fun because I had a soft spot for kids.

"Good afternoon, Doc!" bati nila sa akin.

"Sorry for keeping you waiting."

"Good afternoon," I greeted them. "It's okay, Pastor. I just got off from work."

They ordered drinks and pastries before the meeting started. They had a lot of ideas and suggestions—mga palaro, performance, at activities na pwedeng ilagay sa program. Hindi ko rin maiwasang mapatawa dahil na-i-imagine ko na ang mangyayari.

"Vina, can you teach our children a dance?" tanong sa akin ng asawa ni Pastor.

"Uhm... I work from Monday to Saturday from eight to five. Can they practice in the evening?"

Napaisip ang babae. "We still have three Sundays left before the party. You can teach them every Sunday afternoon."

I nodded, smiling. "Sure."

"Thank you," she replied. "And all of us should wear something red to emphasize the symbol of love."

Tumango ang ibang members.

"We'll have a lot of guests that day, so it'll be a huge gathering." Si Pastor. "Laurice, Jonah, and Vina, can you be the usherettes?" tanong niya pa. "You'll assist our visitors."

Muli akong tumango. "I'm okay with that."

Nakita kong tumango rin ang dalawa.

Ngumiti si Pastor. "Seth, you'll host the entire program," pagpapatuloy niya.