Ice is overrated

Chapter 4

*trigger warm homophobic language and slurs and mention of rape and miscarriage*

Declan

I'm sitting at my mothers table for our weekly dinner with the feast she prepared for all 15 of us. She made a full spread of a variety of smoked meats which include brisket, chicken, meat loaf and probably more with macaroni and cheese. The baked homemade kind that everyone likes. A variety of salads from macaroni salad, potato salad, pasta salad in three different variations and regular salad. My 8 siblings, the three who are in relationships partners and my mothers new boyfriend but that was only 12 place settings. She set three plates aside so I assume Clara and Maze will join us at some point. Maybe Clara has a new person in her life or my mother planned something. Most of my brothers and sisters are single expect for the three gay ones, Lucifer, Kara and Loralie. Their partners are fun people to be around and I'm happy to see that they met people that make an effort to show up to these dinners. My mom has always been open with sexuality with us our father on the other hand was the opposite he never approved of it. When Lucifer, the first one to come out as well as first born, our father didn't take it well. He tried to send him to conversion therapy behind my mother's back. She eventually found out when Lucifer started showing signs that he didn't want to be touched which according to her was a very affectionate kid. I heard this story many times as I'm only a year younger then him and mom would tell it when she got angry that dad didn't show up or showed up late for his weekend. At the time my mom had 5 children under 8. I would say that was the catalyst towards their divorce only 5 years later, after she found out that she was pregnant with Ryder, who is now 10. She filed for divorce and child support two years after that she got full custody of all 10 of us after Kara was found walking on the side of the highway home. After she told dad that she was dating a girl named Sam. He drive 50 miles out to the next town doing over 100 miles an hour dropped her off at the exit they were at and told her to find her own way home. Told her that he would not be the father to another faggot and to learn to be straight raise a family and love a man. From what Kara told me he threw her phone off the charger to the ground, that cracked it and was only on 25%. He then spend off she walked for 5 miles and then called mom. I've never seen my mother more pissed off then that day. After driving almost an hour and seeing her walking on the side of speeding cars.  My mother called her lawyer while at the hospital we took Kara, because her feet were bleeding so bad. My mom was livid and took my father to court after finding out that she recorded the whole thing. I remember that day so clear like it happened yesterday but I was so young, I don't understand why I don't remember something so simple like programming. I think to myself as my siblings chat amongst themselves. "So how is practice going" Zenith my mothers best friend says. "It's going good. Couch is concerned about grades like usual" I say to him as I look at him. I have a suspicion that there is more then friendship between my mother and him but thats their business. The door bell rings and my mom rushes to answer it. "I'm just happy you could make it don't worry about being a little late dear" She says as she walks back in the room with Jake our long time childhood friend. He sits down next to me and mom sits next to him at the head of the table. "I ran into her at the store and she begged me to come to dinner. I couldn't say no since it's her" he says apologetically. I haven't seen him since he broke my cousins heart after I caught him with my high school girlfriend, Clara.
Jake tried to make things better but I couldn't get over the hurt. Then with her falling pregnant and trying to claim it was mine when clearly it wasn't. I had enough and confronted him right before a playoff game that she was only a conquest for him. We ended up fighting on the ice and we were suspended from the game. We barely won thanks to our teammates, but after that we stayed clear of each other until now. "I understand" I mumble back as he starts a conversation with my mother.

I stayed silent for the rest of dinner, Jake says his goodbyes and left. "Did you have to be rude?" My mother asks while giving me her are you kidding me look. "You and that boy were as close as can be and you let a woman come in between you two. What a shame you two could've been unstoppable on the ice and look at you two now. Barely being able to be in the same room together. What a shame" She says shaking her head. "Mom it's more of the fact of how he treats women like they owe him something. It wasn't what she deserved nor is it what any woman deserves" I say as calm as I can. "Declan Thomas Landon" My mother warns using my full name and I wince. I hate my full name especially since it's associated with the father that couldn't stay around long enough until he was sick and needed us for the people he actually loved. I stand up and walk to the front porch. Hearing muffled voices from my mother. Jake used my girlfriend to get back at me for dating his sister who is now married to a women and has a baby on the way. I scoff at how ridiculous this grudge is as a crack of lightning stretches across the sky. A second later it's white wall raining. I smile as the rain settles the anger in my bones since something Jake doesn't know is that he is a father to a wonderful daughter that Clara adores. I felt bad that after we graduated and she and I did a  DNA test that she wasn't mine I tried to help her in anyway possible. I sigh as I see Clara's car pulling up, I knew my mom would create drama and invite him over just because of her. She's always said a father needs to be in the life of his kids but when it came to our father he never bothered no matter how much we begged. He was too busy with his precious hockey pro team. Clara gets out of her car in the pouring rain. I laugh a little as Maze runs up to me. "Hi uncle Declan" Maze smile with her toothy grin. "How's my little princess doing? I haven't seen you in so long" I say as I tickle the almost 7 year old. "I'm grape mommy on the other hand isn't so grape" I laugh as she still having a hard time saying great. "Oh yeah! I bet your uncles and aunties can help with that" I say to as I smile up at Clara as I put Maze down on her two feet. Clara smiles nervously at me as I see her hands start to shake. "Its going to be okay honey" I say to her as I pull her into a hug. "Why does everyone want me to tell him? I don't get it. He wasn't there before and he shouldn't be her now" She says as I pull away from her. "My mom has been reading too many romance novels again. She probably thinks that you and him will end up getting married and living happily ever after but thats not the reality of things. He treated you so bad after you told him and he acted like you got pregnant on your own. I'm concerned for you and Maze, I want the best for both of you" I say as we walk into the house. I hear her take a breath as Maze runs into the dining room, followed by Clara and myself. "Oh look how big you have gotten Mazy!" My mom exclaims as we come into view. I hear Jake take a huge breath in as I stare at him his face then shifts to confusion and then anger. "Not in-front of her" Clara says as she walks away into the kitchen. Jake sits for a second and then follows after her. If you look at Maze she looks exactly like Jake with her big brown eyes, slightly golden skin, light brown hair. We soon here raised voices and Maze looks at me. "Why is mommy so mad?" She says as I sit down and she climbs on to my lap. "She's just hurt by that man, but your mommy is strong and does everything to keep you safe" my mom says as she loads some salad onto a plate for Maze to have. "Oh okay" She said as she picked at the salad in front of her. My mom out some of Mazes favorite salad dressing, a strawberry vinaigrette, on top and Maze went to town eating. I laughed a little at her as everyone shifted down to make more room as Clara and Jake walked back into the room. I notice that Clara cheeks are slightly flushed and rosy as she sits next to me and Jake across from me. "Now look at you. You were definitely hungry" She says as she takes Maze from me. I look at her as I try to take Maze back since knowing Maze has been having some problems with eating regularly and only eats when she is sitting in someones lap. "I got her you eat" I say as Maze basically hops in my lap nearly missing my dick. After she settles down and begins eating again Jake pipes up as he stairs at her. "How old are you Mazikeen" he asks as I try to hold my eye roll in. "I'm 6, I like being called Maze" She says as she glare as him I loose it and laugh four of my siblings joining me. Jake's eyes widen, looking taken back like he didn't see that sass coming. "Okay Maze eat up" Clara says as the little girl does as she is told. After a long period of silence and me looking between Jake and Clara. After I set Maze down  once she finished eating and she pats off to the toys my mother keeps in the living room for her. Everyone finishes up and helps take in the dirty dishes.