Sweet Surrender [18+]

t w e n t y - s i x

"I'm still madly in love with you," Josh said simply, watching her reaction with his deep blue eyes.

Yay! Her heart cheered wildly. You love him! He loves you! Wahoo!

Knock it off, her mind reprimanded curtly.

"You're the first person I've really ever loved," he continued, running a hand through his messy blonde hair. "And I thought you would be someone I'd remember from a long time ago. I tried so damn hard to forget about you, Lauren. I told myself you were living your best life without me."

She closed her eyes for a moment and pressed two fingers against her lips, processing Josh's words without showing any emotion. Lauren hoped the right words would come to her when she opened her eyes, but she remained silent as she watched him fiddle nervously with his wallet.

"During summer football training my junior year, the players volunteered to help build a house with Habitat for Humanity," Josh said, leaning back on his elbow and stretching out his legs over the wooden steps. "I was fine carrying heavy supplies and lumber around, but I was kinda clueless when it came to power tools.

"Fortunately, one of the site managers kinda took me under his wing and taught me the most basic stuff. Even when I completed the required volunteer hours I kept going back because I loved the work, the process. Building a house fascinated me."

Lauren now understood why working on the stone entrance with Josh seemed effortless. The wheels in her mind started turning, wondering if she wanted to persuade him to rebuild the deck, fix the decaying dock, and eventually repair the roof.

"I felt a tremendous amount of accomplishment when I toured the completed house," Josh continued, with a hint of pride in his voice. "I continued to study business at the university, but during the summer, I took a few construction courses at the technical college."

"And you still played football?" Lauren asked, impressed with his determination.

He nodded. "The technical courses helped me find a direction. I liked building furniture; I made my parents a set of wood Adirondack chairs for their backyard. Cara loves the drafting table I made for her, and Michelle has me making custom frames for her photography."

She hung her head in shame at the mention of his sisters' names. Shortly after the breakup, the twins had reached out to her, expressing their clear disdain for their older brother and hoping to keep in touch, but Cara and Michelle were painful reminders of what Lauren had lost.

Eventually, the sisters stopped texting and leaving voicemail messages when Lauren never replied even though she had wanted to do after the hurt had subsided. She had missed their energy and outgoing nature. But she had reminded herself the twins weren't her sisters, and in truth, Lauren hadn't spent that much time with Josh's family to be considered part of it.

"How are your sisters?" she asked quietly, shifting her position to lean against the back of the chaise lounge.

"They're good," Josh replied, with a smile, shaking his head. "They were so mad at me for hurting you that they didn't talk to me for like two  years. Even after I cleaned up my act and apologized to them, they still didn't talk to me."

Lauren smiled at the twins' sweet gesture, but now, she felt worse about not returning their messages.

"I shouldn't have ghosted them," she admitted sadly. "They deserved better than that."

"They understood though," Josh reassured quickly, pulling his shirt out from his back pocket and shrugging into it. "They just wanted to make sure you were OK, and that you knew they sided with you."