Q U E S T I O N S / T H O U G H T S

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L A N D O N O R R I S

Once Lando had gotten Fox through the door of their shared hotel room, he managed to kick the door shut behind them as he held her close to his side. Her hands were freezing; her right hand was currently under his top on his back, helping to keep her upright. He wondered how her hand had come to be there, but he couldn't remember. As he thought about it, he realised it didn't matter.

"Do you think I'm pretty?" The blonde asked him, surprising him. He pulled her towards the bed she had claimed earlier in the day, he managed to get her seated, but she held on tightly to his hands as he tried to pull away.

He looked down at her as she stared up at him, her eyes were innocent as she waited for an answer. Lando wondered what was going on in her mind. He hoped it was just the drink talking for now. The way she kept her fingers clasped around his hand made him think he needed to answer her. "I think you need to sleep off all the drink." She pouted at him, Lando observed her. He didn't want to say the wrong words and risk upsetting her. 

"Everyone wants to be my friend," she looked down at her knees. "But once I've put the credit card away," Lando noticed her glance back up at him. Her eyes were glassy as she spoke about her experiences in life. She looked to the left, a small hiccup leaving her mouth as she stared at the wall. Her hands were still tight on his; he realised she wasn't going to be letting go anytime soon, so he closed his fingers around hers. "Everyone always leaves."

Lando wondered what she meant. Every time she'd been in public with him, she'd always been surrounded by people who she laughed and joked with. When he watched her on the ferry, she shared a moment with her father, a short brief moment but one where she looked happy. Her evening had started great; she seemed like she was enjoying her time with the two lads she called her friends. 

Lando's fame was different from Fox's. 

Whilst he was a sports star, he managed to keep the people he'd been friends with close. The guys he'd grown up with practising to get where he was, were still there. He kept himself to himself after work was done, parties were limited, only attending if it was for a close personal friend or something to do with work. He tried to keep out of the press, only having his name mentioned if it was work-related. Twitch came to him naturally, some of the comments on their put him off, but there was only a few, enough he could deal with it. 

Fox was at the opposite end of the spectrum. She partied, she was in the news, she had a reputation. It seemed when he saw her in the papers, that she had almost no shame. If the press had such a high opinion of her, then so would the public and the people she was friends with. Being in the limelight came with a price. She only showed herself to the world in the wrong light. Right now, though, seeing her in a drunk and vulnerable state made him realise that everything was not always as it seemed. 

"Everything is a mess," she said as she let go of Lando's hands. 

He wanted to ask her questions. He wanted to know what she meant. Drunk people always told the truth, right?

"My father is a multi-millionaire who spends more time working, and with his other children, my mother is a hoarder, my best friend is avoiding me," she rambled on as she looked down at the ground leaning forward, her elbows on her knees. "My other best friend has been fucking around behind my back." She took a deep breath. 

Lando looked at her, worried at the sudden silence. "Fox?"

He watched as she looked up at him through her lashes. Her eyes sparkled in the light of the room; it wasn't the bright colour but the tears that coated her eyes. "I need to sleep."


F O X C O O P E R

Once she turned away from Lando, she curled into the fetal position under the blanket. The lights went off, and as she laid there, she listened. She heard Lando's breathing change, noticing he'd finally fallen asleep as his breaths became lighter and calm. 

The alcohol had started to wear off, leaving her feeling vulnerable. 

If she didn't fall asleep after a night out, then she'd stay awake feeling the guilt she felt right now. It was easier for her to return home, throw up and fall into a deep slumber. The feeling she felt right now was hard on her. Even worse as she began to replay in her mind what she'd told Lando. 

Fox wasn't one to usually let others in too quickly. She didn't talk about her family too much. She had never talked about her mother's problems with anyone. If her father were to find out, there would be a storm. She'd made a mistake in telling someone, letting them in. 

She waited until she was entirely sure that Lando was asleep before she sat up in her bed. Fox moved quickly as she pushed herself off the bed. As the alcohol had started to wear off, given the time that had passed, she found herself tip-toeing in a silent fashion. Getting to the door to the balcony, Fox twisted the key before pulling the door open. 

The cold hit her like a slap in the face, she shivered as she wrapped her arms around herself. When she took the first step outside, she retreated for a moment, holding her foot close to her, shocked at how cold the concrete was. After taking a deep breath, she braved it, walking out onto the balcony closing the door behind her before leaning against the railing and taking in the darkness and silence. 

Fox knew she was not innocent. She'd given out her number, she'd flirted with other men, hell, she'd kissed other men, but sex, that was different. Dean was someone who had been in her life a long time and pretending like nothing had happened was not going to happen. From the moment she had met him, Fox decided he was the one she was going to be with. Once she spoke to him, she realised things were not going to be that simple, but she thought she could change him. 

The cold wind whipped the young woman, she could use the wind as an excuse as to why tears were streaming down her face. She didn't want to admit that she felt almost heartbroken. 

It was not just Dean who had broken her, Charmaine's smug confession was what tipped her over the edge. The two of them sleeping together was no accident, Fox knew how Charmaine felt about her, she wasn't blind. Her friend was jealous, jealous of Fox's life, of her fame and fortune. To Charmaine, having Dean was just another thing she couldn't have. 

Fox closed her eyes for a moment as she leaned her head against the railing. 

At this moment in time, she truly felt herself. 

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