𝕆𝔹𝔼𝕐 𝕄𝔼 𝕆ℕ𝔼𝕊ℍ𝕆𝕋𝕊; 𝚖𝚊𝚒𝚗𝚕𝚢 𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚜𝚝🦋

🖤𝔹ℝ𝕆𝕋ℍ𝔼ℝ𝕊𝕩𝔾ℕ!𝕄ℂ - 𝚕𝚘𝚟𝚎 '𝚗 𝚝𝚛𝚞𝚜𝚝

[Request from Beelzebaby_🤍]

_________________________________________

You had known you'd grow close to them all, since you'd live in the same household and attend the same school, but God was falling in love not meant to be apart of your agenda.
Better yet, none of them felt the same for you.
It became obvious with how they started treating you after you had tried to confide in them about something that had been weighing heavy on your mind.

"I just... It's hard for me, you all hold me to such high expectations and I feel as if I don't have any time for myself these days."

"Well, of course we are going to hold you to high standards. You're our exchange student, after all, your work is a reflection of us and Diavolo."
Calmly, Lucifer had replied, placing his pen down against his desk as he met your gaze beneath his eyelashes.
The other boys sat scattered around the study, all eyes on you, who stood in the door frame, not wanting to get too close in an attempt to keep the ache in your throat at bay.

It's been like this for months, a tense atmosphere filling the house top to bottom, room to room.
The 7 demons who you'd become fond of, and they had became fond of you too just as quick, if not quicker, had became distant and more harsh towards you.
Their expectations of you steadily increased, to the point you felt suffocated trying to keep up to each of their standards.
Whether it was academically, physically or personality-wise, you kept trying to fit the mould they started wanting you to shape in to.
Yet, no matter what you did or you tried to do, you kept disappointing them, or Diavolo, as Lucifer likes to regularly remind you.

And at first you didn't understand where their newfound habits and ideologies came from, until one day it clicked.
It had been around eleven that night, and you wanted to find a snack, secretly hoping to run into the orange haired demon you liked to chat with oh-so-much.
But alas, as you creeped up to pass through the living room to enter the kitchen, you heard muffled voices.

"Swear it wasn't me, Lucifer! It was that damn human again, 'm tellin' ya! They're no good..."
A familiar voice belonging to that of the second born rung out in an annoyed tone and your heart sunk - he was blaming you? Creeping closer towards the door, you gulped, listening intently.
"So you're all telling me that MC within the last week has managed to eat out an entire cupboard in the kitchen, smash two vases due to clumsy nature, steal money from our vault and 'borrow' your belongings and fail to give them back?" Lucifer spoke with little to no emotion, eyeing each of the demons up, almost as if he was suspicious of them himself.

"I'll increase their workload and speak to Diavolo about this, it's unacceptable for them to stay the full duration of the exchange period if they continue to act like this."
With that, the brothers were dismissed and dispersed into their own rooms, leaving you alone as you slid against the wall, holding tears back, a lump caught in your throat.
It dawned on you that not even Lucifer  could see through their lies - none of them trusted you anymore.
After being squatted over the floor for a few minutes regaining your composure, you slowly stood up again, eyes empty and hollow now, petals of carnations and roses piled delicately at your feet, that somewhat familiar feeling still stuck in your throat.

As you trudged aimlessly down the corridor back to your room, only one phrase, or rather thought, could be conjured up in your mind -
Bold of me to expect them to treat me as an equal, they're demons after all.
As you pulled up your laptop and opened up your revision booklet, ignoring the flowers and stems falling from your lips, only one sentence was on your mind -
Bold of me to expect them to treat me as an equal, they're demons after all.
As you lay on your bedroom floor, breathing erratically and sweating furiously, ignoring the growing amount of petals and fauna around you, only one coherent thought was on your mind -
Bold of me to expect them to treat me as an equal, they're demons after all.
As you sat at the dining hall in silence long after everyone had left, trying to desperately to wish and pray the feeling in your throat and put in your stomach away, only one sentence formed in your mind -
How utterly silly of me to think they'd actually love me too, they're demons after all.

U

ntil one day it became too much.
Petals and fauna and stems and roots of various species wouldn't stop seeping from your mouth, and the tears flooding down your face weren't showing any sign of slowing down anytime soon either.
Soon, blood started falling too, the harsh thorns of the rose's tearing at your throat and chin as they slid down your neck.
Desperately clinging to your door handle, the other hand trying to cover your mouth over all the nature and flowers, you desperately pleaded and prayer to your body silently to let you rest.
They weren't going to love you back or trust you again.
They weren't going to help you through this or care for you and your feelings.
So please, body, just stop.
You begged and begged until only hiccups could leave your hoarse and dry throat, petals still falling slowly from the corners of your mouth, too bloodied and hurt to cry anymore.

This is it.
There is no magic cure for this,
no 90% effective treatments,
no magic spells,
nothing.
This is it.
You thought, as you stayed in the corner of your room, back against the door and wall to the right of it, hands between your thighs and eyes staring longingly out of the window, covered in glints of hope and sorrow.
This is it.
The brothers don't care for you - they stopped putting effort into you long ago the more emotionless you became towards them in an effort to keep your emotions and disease at bay.
The 7 of them found it easier to treat you as a disease yourself, you only receiving words of praise mainly from Lucifer for your extra work in curricular activities and studies, but that was it.
You didn't share meals together anymore.
There were no more late night snacks with Beel, naps with Belphie, reading sessions with Satan, hangouts with Mammon and Asmodeus, game nights with Levi or study 'dates' with Lucifer.
And they didn't seem to miss any of it, whilst the guilt of your own emotions ate you up inside quite literally on the daily.
"This is it."
The words escaped your chapped and bloody lips in a whisper and exhaling, you steadied yourself up and trudged through the piles of nature surrounding you, wondering how you were going to be able to keep this secret to yourself any longer as it kept worsening.