When Our Fates Collided

CHAPTER 17

PETRA

So, it's time to reveal my secret.

Like I said my parents are travellers. So, I used to live with my grandma. She is old school but she loves me and so do I. I idolised them a lot and wanted to be like them. They left me with grandma and continued their travelling. I was waiting for my studies to end so that I could join them in their journey. But when I was sixteen, I got first stage brain cancer. Thankfully it didn't damage anything and got cured. I begged my grandma not to tell my parents so that I can still go with them to travel. I had to go on a food strike to stop her. Finally, when I reached twenty, I completed my studies and I joined my parents. We were in France at that time. It was amazing. France was so beautiful. My parents had learnt a lot of languages. I caught up with them soon. We stayed in a new hotel every week. Almost a year had passed by. One day, I was writing my diary. Mom came to me, shaking me and looked all worried.

"What happened, mom?"

But mom was not speaking. She was just moving her lips.

"Mom, this is not funny. What is it?"

Mom continued not to speak and just moved her lips. She took my journal and flipped a few pages and wrote, 'Can't hear me?!'

"Of course not! How can I when you just move your lips mom?"

Mom saw behind me. I turned back. Dad looked anxious.

"Dad?"

And there you go, dad started just moving his lips too.

"What's wrong with you guys?", I asked. Mom began crying. Dad kneeled, took the pencil from my hand and wrote on the desk, 'Baby, we are talking aloud. We aren't just moving our lips. You are not able to hear.'

"WHAT?!"

"Don't worry, baby.", said dad, lipping which I couldn't hear and hugged me. That day they just let me go to sleep early. Both of them slept next to me that day.

When I woke up the next day. I could hear every sound. Mom looked relieved but dad wasn't. He decided to take me to an ENT doctor. The doctor asked for an MRI scan and the neurologists were involved and they gave the verdict that I have a tumour in my head, again. When my parents contacted my grandma, she spilled the beans. My parents were really mad at me and grandma.

We got an appointment with a good surgeon for my treatment. My parents didn't want me to join their journey anymore. I guess that was much better than what my mom said.

"We are all ending this damn travelling. Nothing's more important than our daughter's life."

I felt so bad for them and started hating myself for having the tumour. I didn't want them to lose their chance to enjoy their life because of me. I asked them to leave me after the surgery. I said I could handle myself. I had to learn sign language just in case if I lose my hearing after surgery. I mastered it quickly. Luckily after surgery, my hearing senses were working well. My parents were relieved by that. Mom and dad both weren't ready to leave me. So, I had no choice but to make a fight and hurt them to leave me. It was for their better. I returned back to my grandma's place. After two years, I lost all contacts from my parents. I was worried for them but I said to myself that they were fine. Then the next year grandma passed away. I was alone now. Could my life get any worse? My life sucks! But things started changing after I came here.

I met this wonderful man. Will. Will always respected me. He was always good to me. I knew I could find anyone better than him. But like I said my rollercoaster has more downs than ups. I began forgetting many things. I frequently got headaches. When my visions started getting blurry it was high time. I had to go to the doctor. But the tablets weren't helping me. I knew I had to go back to the city. I knew something was up with my brain again. I went straight to a neurologist. And he was back. Someone who probably loved me more than Will.

Cancer. This time he even has a name. A difficult name. Glioblastoma. And I am going to end with it. Having stage four Glioblastoma basically means death. I have less than a year left. I thought having surgery is almost pointless as the success rate is very low like 4%. I didn't want to take that risk.

I was happy. I was happy with Will. We were happy. Were. I was happy. Now it's time where everything shatters. Everything! All this time was worthless. I am going to die. I hate it! I hate myself! But after some time, I realized that apart from travelling I was happiest when I was with Will. So, dying won't be that sad at all as long as I have him. Let me be selfish. I want to be selfish again. I want Will to be with me. I don't want my only love to go away. I don't want my lover to be not by my side when I die. I want to die happily. I met my grandma's grave one last time and came back to meet my love. My only reason to live.

But my parents were there. I couldn't tell them again. I just had to be a liar and hide my cancer again. I am a bad daughter. A terrible daughter. But I don't want them to feel bad either. At least I don't want to see them cry now. All I want now is happiness. All around me. I want to be selfish. I convinced myself that I can be selfish and there is nothing wrong with that. After all, I have a very short life.

But that vigorous selfish cancer was angry thatI was happy. Though I was on medication I lost my vision again with severeheadache and fainted. I always kept the report and the medicine in my bag justin case. My secret was out. And sadness overloaded everywhere. I am a terribledaughter and lover. I hate myself. I hate my life