It was a little too chaotic, I didn't understand the overwhelming consuming feeling that ran through my skin, I still don't.
Each bitter word, I couldn't control them, it's all just so messy inside my head.
And it's even more confusing that you caused that.
It's easier not to let it go too far, I didn't want to become just the girl you hurt.
Because I still love you, so I guess I couldn't wrap my head around why I feel so heartless.
I think it was easier to push you away, I think it made me feel less weak.
It wasn't fair, I said I would trust you, I think I just really wanted to, but it takes time, god I really need to get there.
I just feel so used, what was it?
My scarred up skin, was my hair not the perfect shiny silky blonde, maybe my stomach isn't flat enough, or was it that I respected myself too much?
Because oh honey, how am I supposed to trust you if you replay the past and I live in it?
