CHAPTER 13 : DESPERATION

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It took me ages before I convinced myself to ring the door bell.
I was glad no one called the cops on me.
I was pretty sure I looked like a stalker pacing nonstop in front of someone else's house.

U can do this Mon! Let's try all that we can. Don't cry! Stay strong! Let's fight!

Before I could even ring the doorbell, a maid came out and opened the door for me.

"She's waiting" was all she said.
I knew it. She knows.
I really can't win against her. I felt like I lost before I even could try. I felt deflated.

G: have u decided where to go?
M: yes
G: have u said ur goodbyes to Sam?
(I knew she would ask! She would never give me the upper hand! What did I even expect?)
M: u asked me to leave but didn't ask me to break up with Sam
G: didn't I? I thought u were smart enough to understand that. I guess I still looked too highly of u
M: is there really no other way?
I can get my masters and PhD here. I promise to pass with honors. I promise I'll be successful. I will reach my goals please just don't ask me to leave Sam!
G: the reason I asked u to leave was because u will never grow with Sam beside u. U r too dependent on her and u will grow complacent. Sam also shelters you a lot so she would never stand by when she sees you struggling. U have to leave it's not up for discussion.
M: what if I can promise that I won't be complacent? I can promise you anything just please let me stay with Sam
G: I already gave u a choice. It's ur decision whether to take it or not.
M: please please don't let me do this. I'm begging you there has to be another way. Please! Can't you just be happy for us? We love each other and we were doing great. I dont have a background or high social status but I love Sam with all of my heart. Can't I be enough? I will work on my weaknesses I promise I won't let you down just please give me a chance.
G: I already gave u a chance and you're wasting it.
U being on your knees right now doesn't help. It just proves that you're weak! Sam needs someone to rely on and ur not capable of it as you are now.
Make your choice Mon coz I won't give u another.

(She's so cruel! I was holding to that last slither of hope that she might grow a heart and see how much Sam and I are hurting and change her mind. She had a point. I am weak and I am nothing right now. Her methods were harsh but it was not without reason. She was just uncompromising with her ideals and that's what I hated about her. I can't even say she's wrong! I can't even blame her! She wouldn't have acted this way if I didn't stay stagnant for the past 2 years. In the end it was still my fault)

I was left there alone with my thoughts on the cold stone floor. I told myself I wasn't going to cry. I was tired of crying and I was tired of fighting. Let me just resign the rest to fate. What will be will be. Let's not pretend that we ever stood a chance against the cruelties of this world.
Sam and I are just victims in this game called life.

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Hi loves!!

Who hates grandma???
Should we call for a change is casting lol!

Tell me what u think! I love reading about them :)
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