The Marauders - Order of the Phoenix - Part Two

The Love Lives of Puppets

All four Marauders, plus Lily, Frank, and Marlene were seated in front of the telly at the Potters' house on the might before Remus Lupin's Birthday. Bowls of popcorn were being passes around and bottles of pumpkin juice.

"I can't believe you're making us watch a bloody puppet show," Marlene said.

"I SAID THE SAME THING DARLING BUT DON'T WORRY, YOU'RE ABOUT TO SING A DIFFERENT SONG - the theme song!"

Frank threw popcorn into his mouth. He'd already been watching the muppets with his mum for the past year. "I still can't believe you lot never watched it before. Mum would have my neck if she knew I didn't tell you about it.."

"I can't believe you kept it from us," James answered, and he ran his hand through his hair as Lily scooted in next to him on the couch, curling up so her knees were pressed to her chest and her head was on his shoulder, his arm about her loosely.

Sirius was sitting on the floor. Remus was doing homework at the same time, sitting on the floor also, his notes spread all over the coffee table. 

"I think I like the blue one with the odd nose," James said after the theme song had played.

"Gonzo," Frank supplied.

"Kermit is best," Lily said, shaking her head. "He looks like you."

"Excuse me?" James asked.

Sirius started hooting from the floor. "I SEE IT I CAN SEE IT!"

Lily laughed and kissed James's cheek.

"I rather like Miss. Piggy," Frank said.

"Miss Piggy? Really?" Sirius said, looking over at Frank with a smirk, "Is it all the felt cleavage that does it for you?" 

Marlene looked up. "....There's felt cleavage?"

 "Loads," Sirius said.

Marlene blinked with an expression somewhere between confusion, interest, and disgust. "Why?"

"She's a diva," Frank said, as though he were talking about a human, "And very fancy. She and Kermit are together."

"OOooh are they?!" Lily asked, sitting forward.

Sirius looked at Lily, his mouth twisted in amusement.

"Are we discussing the love lives of... puppets...?" Remus asked.

"I think they are, yes," Marlene said.

"Alright then, just wanted to make sure I was understanding that correctly," Remus laughed.

As though in answer to the discussion, the next skit on the show had Gonzo talking about dating one of the chicken puppets, Camilla, and he was nervously discussing whether Kermit thought Camilla might like him back and what to do if he was - joking that if he passed out the chicken would have to give him mouth to mouth. "Aw, look at him loving his chicken... oh and he has flowers for her," Lily said. "He's so sweet."

"He reminds me a bit of Xeno Lovegood," James laughed, "Remember with the wilted daisies on the Express that time?"

"Oi yes!" yelled Sirius pointing at James and nodding. "That's very encouraging for you, Gonz - you'll get your chick in the end.

"...your chick..." snickered Peter.

"Can chickens and.... whatever the hell he is... get together?" Remus asked pragmatically. "Seems like a logistical nightmare..."

Sirius grinned at Remus, then turned back to the telly as Remus turned red. "You know all about logistics, Moonie, 'ey?"

"You know, I'm not sure what Gonzo is," Frank said, completely skipping over what was clearly Sirius being typical Sirius.