Love Conquers All

03.) Regret this.

Siphiwokuhle's POV

"Sukoluhle the meeting is not necessary." I say. At this point i should stop trying to convince her because she has made up her mind but I'm too lazy to have to argue with Senzo about this issue of not maintaining his child properly. His reasoning for not supporting his child is stupid and I've tried numerous times to tell him to change but he doesn't listen. I don't know what I saw in him back then.

"Siphiwokuhle I don't care whether you find this meeting necessary or not but it is taking place." she says and i sigh. "It's just that you don't understand the repercussions of your actions. He is taking care of his child now so why ruin it by doing this." I say. "Siphiwokuhle Zungu ungangicasuli mtakama uyayenzakala lomhlangano uthanda noma ungathandi." I sigh.

(don't piss me off my mother's child this meeting is happening whether you like it or not.) We finish eating our food in silence and once we are done eating I stand up and take the plates and glasses to the kitchen. She follows me to the kitchen and sits on the bar stool. I pour water in the sink and fill it with dishwashing liquid and start washing the dishes.

"Siphiwokuhle me calling me this meeting isn't me wanting to cause unnecessary drama in your life. I love you and i would never try and stir up conflict that I will leave you to deal with alone. I am doing this because we have to. This guy feels entitled to you and how long have you guys been separated," "Eight years now." I answer. "Exactly so why does he still have that hold over your life eight years later."

I shrug my shoulders and sigh. I can feel the tears forming in my eyes and i try to blink them away but one tear cascades down my cheek which releases the other tears I'm trying to hold. She stands up and moves to my side and pulls me in for a hug. How long will I keep crying over Senzo? I am honestly tired and i don't know why I let him get to me.

But he is hurting my son with his actions. Having to look at my son getting disappointed by him hurts. Sometimes I hear him cry in his bedroom. He thinks I don't know this but I do. And it hurts feeling like I've failed him. It would have been better if he is six feet under because we know he isn't coming back but this...this is not healthy.

He likes raising my child's hopes for nothing and i hate that Samkelo falls for it everytime. Even though i sometimes warn him I can't really keep him away from his father. He should be the one that says or decides that he wants nothing to do with him and I'll be there to help pick up the pieces with him but I'm glad he is giving him the last chance now so if he does the samething we will be officially closing a chapter we will never go back too.

"Its going to be okay mtakama." She rubs my back soothingly and continues whispering soothing words. This reminds me of back then when she used to comfort me and whisper soothing words, I believed her when she said things will be okay and they did but with this one, I'm not so sure if it will be. "Will it ever be though?" I ask in between sniffs. "It will be one day and this meeting needs to be held to show him his problem and maybe his family will tell him to do the right thing." I scoff.

"Those people are narcissistic and selfish. They won't talk to him because they will think he is reprimanding me or putting me on a leash by not taking care of the child. I told them once about this matter and they didn't see anything wrong with it. They won't change their ways now." I say. "You went there alone the first time this time around we are here." she says.

I pull away from her embrace and wipe the tears with the sleeve of my sweater. I continue with the dishes and once I'm done she puts them away in the cupboard and i wipe the sink and counter. I hang the dishcloth on the oven handle. "Can we talk about something else. I just wanted to have fun and not deal with my issues." I say.