#visible

Compliments

A compliment. Something everyone loves to receive. But have you noticed they usually have one thing in common?

Appearance.

They way people look.

I don't know about you, but for many years if there was one thing I never believed were the compliments I received. Going in and out of hospitals, too tired to get out of bed let alone walk- and no energy to some days even brush my hair, I did not feel beautiful, or pretty. So when people told me those things, I never believed them. I still don't really.

Low self esteem. I know I have it and I know it is because of my disability. I am always self conscious about the way I look. My feet bow outwards slightly because my ankles and knees dislocate when I walk. My spine curves at the top of my neck, pushing my head outwards a little because my shoulders sit out of joint. I was bullied at school for the way I looked, and I know I'm not the only one. If someone compliments me now, either I get suspicious or think they are just saying something out of politeness.  

But there is more too it than that. Why do you think young boys and girls grow up to think that appearance is the most important thing? Its because from a very young age, people are telling them how pretty/ handsome they look- usually its one of the first things you will say to a child when you see them.

There are so many other aspects of a persons personality that need to be empowered. I saw a great post from Buzzfeed the other day that had just a few-

I admire your confidence.

You're empowering.

Your positive energy is infectious.

Your intelligent.

You're a light.

You're so funny.

You have a beautiful soul.

You inspire me to work hard.

You're a badass.

You're so talented.

I love your energy.

You're heart is full of kindness.

You are a good listener.

You have a calming presence.

Your passion is contagious.

I can always depend on you.

I am happy you exist.

You could even make Kanye smile.

These are the kind of compliments that actually matter- and that I would actually take seriously if someone said one to me. Because they are REAL. They are compliments that make you feel warm and fuzzy- because you believe them.

What's your favourite compliment?