#visible

The Spirit of Thanksgiving

As the festive season steadily approaches - and by steady, I mean rocketing toward us at lightning speed - I am considering the spirit of Thanksgiving.

I'm no American but I was always intrigued by their November Holiday of Thanksgiving. There is no such celebration in Northern Ireland and I think that is a little sad. Aside from the historical content of the tradition, I do believe it is no bad thing to purposefully exercise thankfulness, especially those of us with illness and disability.

Hark...thy followers call...

What would anyone with illness have to be thankful about?

Well, yes, okay, there is nothing wonderful about being sick. Trust me, I'm not leaping out of bed in the morning and singing my joyful thanksgiving for my dodgy pelvis and shady immune system - quite the opposite actually. Normally I haul my exhausted, sleep deprived, body out of bed and waddle uncomfortably to the nearest lavatory. All the while grimacing in pain and silently cursing the alarm clock gods for incessantly laughing at me for thinking sleep was a gift they were willing to bequeath me...foolish girl.

Oh, and I never feel like gushing my thanks to the gynaecology physiotherapists. I really, REALLY, don't feel like thanking them during my bi-monthly appointments. I feel like kicking them in the teeth for the new torture - I mean treatment - routines they conjure up each visit.

And, I am feeling in no way inclined to verbalise my thanks when ignorant people give me their opinions on how 'I don't look sick' or 'It's all in my head'. Truthfully, I never feel the urge to just give them a great, big, handshake and thank them for their useless drivel that made me waste precious moments of my life - that I'll never get back - listening to their idiocy.

Yet, it is for precisely these reasons that I believe it is drastically important and healthy to be thankful. Of course that doesn't mean being thankful for those horrible daily struggles, far from it, but it does mean considering a new point of view - a positive slant so to speak.

Sometimes I wonder what my life would be without my illnesses?

Yeah, sure it be pain free and I wouldn't feel like a medical lad rat with every visit to the doctor. Truthfully, there would be a lot of things that would great if I weren't ill, but, let's be real...it's not going away.

So, do I waste my days pining after a life without illness and be miserable in my resentment at being robbed of a happier, healthier, me? Well, I could but wouldn't I miss out on so much if I did that? I think I would.

This is were an exercise in thankfulness can help, because when I'm having a really, really, bad day, it can be very easy to feel down about life. However, instead of getting grumpy I take a moment to think about what I'm thankful for; to really ponder something that I wouldn't know or have if I wasn't disabled.

I'm thankful that I understand pain, so that when others are suffering I am in a position to be compassionate. Having and coping with pain makes me stronger, flexible, and sympathetic. It teaches me to listen to my body, something many folk forget how to do, and because of this I know how to stop and avoid the stress. Yes, pain isn't nice but it is useful, and I'm thankful that I know that.

Attending the physiotherapists, the doctor appointments, even the scary consultant visits have their benefits too. I've learned to communicate with many people that joe public never get to meet. I've learned a wealth of information about these professions, and the services they provide, and because of this I can support others deal with the often nerve wrecking experience of coming into contact with care services. Best of all I have access to these services when many people don't. I am fortunate and blessed to live in a country that offers me so much support to deal with my conditions. Yes, all of this is indeed something to be very thankful about.

As for the ignorant sods who like to think they are medical experts...well...I'm just eternally grateful that I am not that stupid. Thankful that I was born with a brain, a heart, and a bit of courage to know that just because someone doesn't look sick doesn't mean they aren't suffering, and I sure as heck am not frightened to ask if that soul needs any help!

So, when life with your illness or disability is getting you down have a mini thanksgiving feast. Clink glasses with your loved ones. Take a look back on your path to date and say thank you for all the amazing things you've achieved, struggles you've overcome, and knowledge you've gained.

Life with a disability isn't unfulfilling, far from it, it is actually extremely rich and fulfilled...but sometimes we have to have a Thanksgiving to remind ourselves of just that.

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