Bitten By The Past (Camren)

10. Let Me Kiss You

Camila's POV

I rip off my shoes and throw them carelessly to the side of the room before planting myself face first into my bed.

Why did I have to mess it up? Everything was perfect. It was going perfectly, and I had to mess it up by not kissing her. And it took everything in me not to do so. I mean of course I wanted to, heck I was staring at her lips half of the night, but I just couldn't.

I haven't had my first kiss yet...so I'm just so scared I'll mess it up. I'd do anything to kiss Lauren but I just can't bring myself to actually do so.

I hear the door open from Mani and Ally's side of the room, but I don't even bother to look up, the events from a few minutes ago putting me into defeated state.

"Yo Mila! Didn't hear you come back, how'd the date go?" I clearly hear Dinah's voice from under the pillow I currently had my head buried under.

"Just dandy." I put a sarcastic thumbs up in the air.

I then feel brisk air to my head as the pillow is ripped off of me. I sit up a bit irritated and look at a confused Dinah.

"What happened?" She questions inquisitively. I shake my head. "I'm a huge fuck up that's what happened." I sink back down into my bed.

"Did the date not go well?" She asks more specifically.

I smile to myself thinking about the actual date itself and I find myself relaxing at the thought of how well it went, how great Lauren and I clicked. And then I mentally slap myself for messing it all up in the end.

I turn over in my bed and prop myself up with my left arm as I look to Dinah who was now sitting on her bed looking directly at me, waiting almost impatiently for an answer.

"It was amazing..." I sigh heavily. She furrows her eyebrows in confusion. "Then why are you so bummy?" She hits my leg. "She tried to kiss me..." I frown thinking of how great that would have been.

"And...you didn't wanna? I get that first date kisses, some people don't go for that stuff." She nods. "No see that's not it. I wanted to...Dinah I really wanted to, its just I--" I was at a loss for words and I hated what I had to say next.

"I've never had my first kiss." I barely whisper.

Dinah looks at me in disbelief and admiration at the same time. She lifts herself off of her bed and comes over to mine, sitting next to me and extending a hand to my knee.

"Aw Mila, that's actually really cute." She smiles. "No, its not. I wanted to kiss her so badly but I was afraid that I'd screw it all up. I don't know about these things Dinah, how do you kiss someone? Do you like lick their teeth or bite their tonsils I'm not sure." I mutter.

Her laughter comes out smoothly but heavy after awhile. "Neither. Look Mila, you're thinking too much. A kiss is simple. And your first one doesn't have to be all tongue, freaky and wild. It comes natural. And since you said you wanted to kiss Lauren...I'm sure that it'd come natural to you...ya know had you given yourself a chance to do so." She points out.

I cover my face with my pillow and groan in frustration.

"You're right. And I bet it also doesn't help that I basically slammed the door in her face after I almost broke my neck trying to get in here so quick." I mumble.

"Yeah probably not. Hey, call her." She suggests. "Tell her why you did what you did, and how you're feeling. She deserves that right?"

I release the pillow from over my head and sigh, knowing Dinah was right, but I wonder would she talk to me right now? Damn, I wouldn't even wanna talk to me right now after all of that.

"Yeah...she does." I agree. "I just hope she'll give me the chance. I really messed things up."

"Hey, remember. She tried to kiss you not too long ago. I don't think she's giving up that easy." Dinah pats my leg while getting off of my bed. "I'm going to take a shower. Handle your busy-ness" She winked as she headed into the bathroom.

I sit up and grab my phone out of my pocket to see a few new messages, all from Lauren.

From: LoLo :)

I'm extremely sorry I was moving way too fast, plz don't be mad.

From: Lolo :)

Who am I kidding of course you're mad, plz just tlk to me?

From: Lolo :)

I'm freaking out over here, I bet I scared you off for good just plz :( I'm sorry Camz.

I find it cute how she's freaking out more than I am and it was my choice to complicate things and make them extremely and uncomfortably awkward.

I decide to take Dinah's advice and call her instead of texting back. After about a ring and a half she picks up.

"Camz?" She frantically answers.

"Hi." I mumble.

"I. Am. So. Sorry. I never should have tried to kissed you. I don't know what came over me I just...it felt right. I didn't know what else to do at that point. Please, please forgive me." She begs.

I simply smile at her desperate plea, just happy with the fact that she isn't extremely mad at me like I am.

"Camz? You there?" She asks uneasy.

"I'm here. Um, don't feel sorry Lo. Can you meet me out by the fountain like now? I know its almost curfew and all but I promise to make it quick." I mutter not quite sure where I'm heading with this.

I hear a shuffle of keys and feet.

"On my way!" She says before hanging up.

I take a deep breath, collect my shoes from the ground and hurriedly put them on as I make my way out of my dorm and lock my door behind me.

I finally get out of the building and rush across campus to the fountain I absolutely admire.

I knew what I had wanted when Lauren walked me to my door. I was eager myself to kiss her, to feel her lips on mine. I just couldn't bring myself to doing it out of my own self-conscience that took over.

I embarrassed myself, and more than likely I bet I embarrassed her as well. I'm fixing that mistake right now. You know its funny, twice in one day I've had to go back and go after an opportunity that I failed to take the first time it was handed to me.

As easy as it was to say 'yes' to Lauren asking me out, I made it complicated. And now she tries kissing me and I wuss out. I think this girl is making me fall for her already. In ways I can't even imagine.

I speed walk fast to towards the now in sight fountain and look too see Lauren's figure already standing there looking in my direction.

As fast as I was walking you'd think I would've gotten here first. I'm now almost running towards her at the fastest pace ever not being able to wait to get to her.

"Camz look--" I cut her off by jumping into her arms, wrapping my arms around her waist and finally connecting our lips, silencing her, and surprising us both.

Its exactly like I imagined it. It felt as if it was just us two. Nothing moving around except space and time.

Her lips were soft. Timid, yet eager. Her lips quivered from the sudden contact, and moulded perfectly with mine as we were in sync.

I retracted from her, gaining a subtle whimper from her due to the now lack of contact.

I stepped back shocked by what I just did as I raised a hand up to my lips and traced over them.

"Wow..." I breathe out. She had the same emotion on her face that I did.

"Wow uh...wow." I tried again but nothing would come out. "What was that?" She exhales.

I look at her and smile as I regain edge again.

"That..." I point at her. "Was the best first kiss ever." I blush.