"My inspiration was her."
Mackenzie couldn't help but get angry at the thought of spending the summer with her famous brother and away from her home team.
She was 23 for God's sake.
But with her encounter with her brother's bandmate and best frien...
I was speechless, staring at him with eyes brimming with tears.
"Don't." I mutter, letting the first tear fall.
"Don't be sorry for loving me. If anything, I forgive you for it. I'd do anything to hear those words." I cry out, hugging him harder.
"Listen to me clearly Kenzie, I'm dead."
My heart stops.
What kind of sick joke was he playing?
He's so clearly living and breathing right in front of my eyes.
"Haha. Very funny." I joke sarcastically, rolling my eyes.
Maybe he finally had so much of that shit that he's loopy out of his mind.
"They said it'd be a miracle if I lived past 20." He breaths out, not looking at me.
What?
Today was filled with too many revelations that I wasn't sure I was ready for, let alone him.
"The chronic pain was a start, it was a mental case at first. Then it hit all around my jaw and it would drive me crazy." He explains, swallowing as if the words shouldn't have came out.
"Then it goes to the depression and anxiety. I'm so fucked up to the point where I've overdosed not once or twice, but four times." Adrian sighs, picking up the mess he made on the roof before putting it all back into their respective containers.
He stairs up at the stars once more and closes his eyes as he mutters something before leading me back down the route I took to find him.
"When people say death gets easier, it doesn't. Most people just learn how to cope. But in the case that you're so fucked up in the head already like me, it awakes you. The demons you though were leashed and held down by the cabinets of prescription pills are suddenly free. It hurts, they never tell you how to cure that." He laughs sickly, reminiscing something from the past.
And for the first time since he started opening up, I'm scared.
Not because he loves me or that I love him back.
Not because we are so young and declared our love for each other in such a short amount of time.
Not because he's been through so much and still managed to make it to where he is.
The thought hits me as he pulls me close to him as he falls asleep on the bed, Adrian's breath evening out.
It's then that I weep silently, careful not to wake him.
It's then that I cry for the fear that's been gnawing at the back of my head since he opened up to me.
He's trying to warn me.
That one day,
He might not be here to hold me as much as I need him when he need me.
One day, he's sure that the Adrian that loves me will be gone.
I'm not sure whether my thoughts are processing right or my hazy mind is finally succumbing to its crazy thoughts.
Then, I realize why I was truly scared.
One day, he knows he will die.
And I can't pick up the pieces of him anymore.
And that is what scares me beyond what words can express.
Because all of a sudden, the rude, arrogant asshole means so much more to be all of a sudden.
•••
"Adrian?" I mumble, making my way up steps that render themselves oddly familiar.
"Adrian!" I call out, still waiting for an answer.
It's then that panic kicks in and I find myself running, up the last of the steps and through a large master bedroom.
The bed is tidy and the room feels like home, decorated with pictures that radiate happiness.
I find myself shuffling through the cabinets looking for something before giving up and running towards another door.
I look around and my eyebrows furrow.
Where am I?
That's me.
I realize, watching someone cry.
I almost feel pity and sorrow for her, for myself.
What's—
"Kenzie?" A voice calls out, looking at me with worried, tired eyes.
"How'd you sleep?" I asked, propping my head up.
I shake the awful thoughts from my head and look at him with a sincere smile that reassured him, even if it's only for a little bit.
"Honest to god, I feel like I need to take another hit but it's the first night I've gotten sleep in 4 days and I'm thankful for that. For you." He grins before sitting himself up.
"Come on, I've got an interview and you have practice today don't you?" He questions, slipping on a clean shirt.
"Nah." I shake my head, "I have a meeting with my trainer until 12 and then I'm all yours." I smirk knowing his mind has wandered to more naughty thoughts.
"Then, would you like to go to my interview as well? We'll have some fun afterwards." He winks making me nod in excitement.
I give him a peck on the lips before being pulled back and kissed harder, "I'll expect these as goodbye kisses from now on, its better than a measly peck to remember your lips."
My smile goes from ear to ear before I pull him into a hug and make my way to my room to change and catch a ride with Justin who is probably waiting in the kitchen.
For once, I followed my heart instead of listening to my brain or Justin for that matter.
I can only hope that it was the right decision in the end.
Even if it means I get hurt.
•••
Okay okay! I'm back from vacation!
How was that chapter?
How many of y'all are in your feels for Adrian still?
Don't nope around too much cause the upcoming chapter should be really cute!
Please enjoy and vote, comment, follow, and share!
-Anne
P.S. A new book is coming out soon!
•••
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