broken as i • a kylo ren story

xii (l)

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"y/n." kylo breathed as he was suddenly felt a drastic change in the force while taking laps around his room, trying to calm down.

he gulped as he shook his head. "no. no, that cant be. i-" instantaneously after starting his second sentence, he experienced that same painful pang as that night he saved you.

he knew it was the force urging himself over to you, but he just-

without even thinking, he rushed out the door and started headed over to the medbay. "fine, fine. it's fine, your fine, s- jaxx."

he quickly did a 180 and started heading for your brothers room- he knew that the 2 of you would want to see each other first thing.

now that he thought about it, bringing jaxx was a real good idea because if things got awkward- there was always your brother. kylo actually didnt find him anymore annoying, irritating, or just..maddening then he would a normal adult per say. since he continued training with the little boy, he realized that he was quite talented and very strong with the force.

his skills were improving each day, and his motivation seemed to almost increase at the same rate. kylo could see how much effort and energy jaxx put into training, and he was...pleased with it.

while dashing over to jaxxs room, kylos mind went wild.

how were you- are you actually- did the force healing-

kylo knocked on the little boys door, and it suddenly flung up. jaxx was still laying in his bed, reading a book of some sort- so he clearly used the force.

"whats up?" jaxx asked as he looked up at kylo.

he noticed the expression on the darkly clothed man, and he instantly knew what was happening.

"are yo-" kylo gave a small and slow nod before he exited the room, waiting outside for the boy to get ready.

your brother quickly got ready in record time, and rushed out of the door- almost hitting kylo.

"so..sorry." he stuttered as he straightened his back, following kylos lead.

both kylo and jaxxs uneasiness were rising, their steps becoming more stern and rapid. the entire walk- or dash, to the infirmary was completely silent between the 2.

when they reached it, there was a brief stop infront of the doors- both taking in a synchronized deep breath as they shut their eyes for a split second.

kylo opened the doors and could literally feel your presence in the air- he assumed jaxx could too. he didnt even bother talking to aubree or any of the other nurses, instead speeding with jaxx right to your room.

everyone in the medbay that worked in that section knew about your strange recovery, but only kylo knew the reason for it. he was still puzzled, but he was...grateful.

when they approached the door, jaxx quickly ran infront of kylo and opened the door with the force- rushing right in.

kylo followed immediately, and his eyes locked with yours. his heart skipped a beat-actually a few beats, because he felt like it was a dream. that feeling that he got whenever you were around, or just in his thoughts once again resurfaced- though it technically never left,  and though he would never admit it.

you, were sitting right there...fully conscious with barely any machines or cords connected to you, and looking right at him.

but, the way you were looking at him- he was confused.