Squire (Male x Male) (Wattys Shortlist 2021 & 2022)

Chapter 15 - The Surrender

Warning: This chapter contains scenes of a sexual nature. Reader discretion is advised.

I reverted to not drinking wine again after Richard's birthday. Not that I blamed the wine particularly, I just knew that it did not do my already waning willpower any favours. Richard still offered, but no longer tried to persuade me to drink with him when I refused. Neither of us mentioned the events that took place on the evening of his birthday, and aside from the odd flirtatious comment when we were alone, Richard managed to keep his emotions in check.

On the outside, I aimed to look unaffected by his presence, but there was still significant effort involved in hiding the goosebumps that appeared in his presence. Underneath the surface, I was starting to crack under the prolonged exposure, and I was terrified I may not have the strength of character to resist whatever his next stunt might be.

The second week of August brought another heatwave. As before, Aaron, Paul and I did the bare minimum we needed to get through it and keep hydrated. The shade of the stables helped, and as always, we tried to make the best of it.

The second day of the scorching weather was a Friday. I finished my working day sweating from every conceivable pore, needed to wash and change before I could face Richard. It was around half past six, and while I was mid-wash, that I heard a knock on my door.

Still dripping, I wrapped a towel around my middle to cover my modesty and opened the door a little. Richard was leaning against the wall outside my room and smiled when he saw me.

"Sebastian," he greeted me warmly. "It is too hot for games tonight, so I have decided on a trip to Gadwall Lake to cool down."

"I understand," I replied, trying not to show my disappointment. "It is particularly hot this evening. Thank you for letting me know."

I forced a smile and started to close the door, but Richard's foot prevented me from completing the action.

"Of course, you are welcome to join me," he added. "But if you do, it will be on the condition that your reticence remains here." He dropped his voice to a whisper before continuing. "If I cannot touch, I at least want to look."

His eyes lowered to the parts of me I was unable to cover with the towel and back up again.

My heart flipped over, and my body reacted in ways I wished I could prevent.

Richard moved his foot back out of my doorway.

"I will see you in the stables in ten minutes," I breathed, and closed the door.

I stood with my back against the door, pulse racing as I tried to work out what just happened. What did I say that for? My brain had certainly not been involved in my agreement to go with him, yet I heard my mouth say the words.

I concluded that my heart was starting to win the ongoing war with my head, and the cracks in my resolve were deepening.

I thought about what I had just agreed to. Getting undressed in front of him seemed like a small price to pay to see his muscular body again. There was no harm in either of us looking at each other when alone, surely?

I chastised myself as I headed back towards the sink. I would not have told myself that a few weeks ago.

I was soon clothed and heading towards the stables. Richards had already mostly saddled the horses. I helped complete the task and we mounted the steeds.

"I am looking forward to cooling down," Richard smirked as we started trotting north east in the oppressive heat.

"Yes," I replied. "And the perks that accompany it, no doubt," I added, rolling my eyes.