The Love We Choose

Chapter 29

Nestled on the couch Huan and Lynne ate their ice cream in silence together while aiming their attention at a reality competition show. Sitting up and placing the top on her cookies and cream ice cream container, she put it on the coffee table before stretching her neck from side to side. Having laid in that position for an episode and a half, her neck muscles were tight. Rearranging herself so that she was comfortable against his side, she placed her head on his shoulder.

"So you gonna tell me what had you drinking whiskey in the dark like the protagonist of a Sylvia Plath novel?" She could feel the fleeting moment his body stiffened. "When you got off the phone with me earlier you sounded so out of it. And all you said to me when I called to check in with you was, you didn't have a good day. Not for nothing, but you never just say, 'I didn't have a good day.' You always elaborate and talk my ear off." She reached out and wrapped her arms around his torso, squeezing him tight. "When you're ready, I'm here." she told him, not taking her eyes off of the television nor letting up on the hug.

Huan nodded silently and continued to eat his ice cream, not looking at Lynne or responding. When he finally opened his lips, his words were not what she expected. "What happens to the baby if something happens to the two of us?"

"Huh?"

"If something happens and we are in an accident, what is going to happen to our baby?"

"Well, we've got a host of family members between the two of us. I'd imagine they would come to some sort of agreement and take care of the child. I mean, I haven't updated my living will yet since the baby isn't here yet. I thought we'd have a few months before we had to think of something like that."

"Time moves so quickly, Lynne," he told her, placing his empty ice cream container on the table before turning to her. "Months turn into years and things like this fall into the cracks. We have to have a plan in place now."

Moving her hands from around him and placing them tenderly on the side of his face. "Ok. Then that's a conversation we will have soon. I mean, I thought the whole godparents thing would be a third trimester conversation, but it's never too soon. I guess. I just want to let you know, I don't plan on dying anytime soon. Do you?"

"Noone ever plans on dying, Lynne," he told her, the stress evident in his features. "It just happens. For heaven's sake, you work in a school. School shootings are always a risk. There's at least one each month."

"Calm down Huan. I won't be willingly putting myself in harm's way anytime soon. Do you plan on dying anytime soon?"

"You can't-," he started before she cut him off with a swift shake of her head.

"Answer the question Huan. Do you plan on dying anytime soon?" She tightened her grip on the side of his face, forcing him to focus on the stern look she was giving him.

"No."

"Good. Then we can have this conversation on another day," she informed him after kissing his forehead. Standing, she picked up the remote and turned off the television. "After you've gotten a good night's sleep and your brain isn't alcohol-fogged."

"I'm clear-headed, Lynne."

"The half-filled bottle of whiskey I put away earlier says otherwise," she quipped before walking into the kitchen to throw out his empty container and place hers in the freezer. Once done, she returned to his living room and stood in front of him. "Come on." Grabbing his hands, she tugged him up and led them both to his bedroom.

Reluctantly, he followed her instruction, sitting on one side of his bed while she went into his bathroom. Briefly he closed his eyes and was transported back to the emergency room. Blood stained the bed, the floor, his scrubs, his hands, and even his shoes. The air was pungent with a mix of sterile cleaning products, dirt, and grease.