Now I See You // Jikook // ⚠18+⚠

*34*

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Song recommendations: Lights- BTS
 (Seriously, it's like this song was written for this chapter)
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His hands were shaking as he pressed the bell, the muffled sound of the ringing spiking his nervousness to a maximum level. 

He knew this moment would come.
He knew Hoseok was still sick.
That no matter how beautiful those past weeks were, he was still bipolar.
He would still be haunted by his depression. 

It started yesterday, when he noticed how quiet and drawn back he was, leaving his apartment at eight when he usually stayed until midnight, or simply the entire night.
Sometimes they just cuddled, enjoying each other's company as they talked in soft voices about this and that, deep talk or just nonsense.

And sometimes their cuddling turned into more, their bodies heating up as they got entangled in each other's bodies.
At times, they were all teeth and clawing at each other, trying to get closer- to find that earth shattering release, chasing it like they were both starving for it.
At other times, they were taking it slow, Hoseok being so endlessly gentle as he moved inside him, nibbling at his ear when he told him how much he loved him. 

And waking up in his arms- there were no words to describe the feeling, just that every single time he would stare at him for as long as it took Hoseok to wake up, admiring the shape of his face, his nose, jaw, the way his hair fell into his forehead in soft, brown waves.

His heart would nearly leap out of his chest when he realized anew that this was real.
That Hoseok was his boyfriend.
That he was no longer alone. 

Maybe that's why this was so hard now. 

Hoseok hadn't turned up at school. 
Hadn't turned on his phone, the call going straight to voice-mail. 
And now here he was, his heart hammering in his chest. 

The door opened. 

The woman smiled, ready to say hello, then widened as she took him in: 
His height, his black hair, the oversized grey shirt and black, skinny jeans.
"Oh. My. God! You...you're Yoongi, right?"

She was maybe three of four years older than him, the same dimples on her cheeks as her brother while she beamed up at him.

He nodded silently.
Dawon let out a little squeal and immediately grabbed his hand to pull him into a hug. 

He was so dumbfounded, he had no idea what to do as she hopped in his arms like an excited little bunny.  

"Finally! I've been begging and begging my brother to introduce you, but he always said you needed more time. And now you're here! Ahh, and you're so cute!" 
She drew away, then pinched his cheeks. 

And here they were, thinking Hoseok was the bubbly one...

"Hi." 

He felt stupid, but he didn't know what else to say. 
"Come in, come in! My parents are at work, but I just made some pancakes, you want some?"
He stumbled after her as she had already dragged him along inside the house. 

It was beautiful with a lot of open windows, wooden floors and bright colors. 
Dawon led him into the kitchen and the smell of freshly baked goods filled his nose.
"Here. I don't know if they're any good though."

She already handed him a plate with a pancake, then looked up at him with expecting, big round eyes. 
"I... I was actually here to see Hoseok." he mumbled out as he took a small bite. 

A shadow crossed Dawon's face as she bit her lip, her hair falling into her face as she looked at the floor.
"Oh, yeah... he's having one of his days." 

He nodded, feeling somber and still nervous.
He only ever comforted Hoseok over the phone, but seeing him- he was afraid of what it would be like.
To see the tears and the hollowed out expression he only heard in his voice until now.