Letters On Our Skin || BangChan

10

I asked Chan to explain to the boys why I had left their dorm so abruptly and that I am very sorry for being rude.
He must have kept his promise, because that night Felix sent me a video message of himself.
His face close to the camera, he pushes his voice an octave higher than it is, and says, "Livvy-Bivvy, Chan just got home from your date! He's all flushy and smily, and he told us all about you! We're very glad you're okay, we were so worried! Never do that again, please. Come over again soon! I miss you!"
Ever since that night, I get daily messages and pictures from him and the boys. It's like they're trying to fill up my phone's storage.
Now that it's Saturday, I can finally relax. I don't work on Sundays, which means I have the night off.

I got home from work an hour ago. I've been staring at my empty fridge for the better part of it. I must have forgotten to go get groceries.
Suddenly my phone rings and I pick up without  checking.
"Residence of Olivia, speak or parish," I say and open the cupboard in search of cereal or pasta.
"Hi," Chan says and chuckles, "I didn't know you could be so bossy."
"Chan," the cupboard snaps shut, "I didn't know it was you."
"Ah, don't worry. I actually thought the attitude suits you quite well." He chuckles again and I want to melt into the ground.
He continues, "I actually just wanted to see if you were free tonight. The kids and I wanted to order pizza, and we wanted to ask if you'd join us?"
"Chan," I answer, "You're a godsend. I'd love to. Should I come over right now?"
"Sure," he says, "like last time, yeah? Oh, and since you don't have to work tomorrow, you could stay the night. If you want to..."
"Okay," I say and my voice hitches, "Yeah, if you guys are alright with that."
"Of course! You know we love to have you here!"

This time, Changbin awaits me in the lobby.
He hugs me tight as a greeting and shimmies his shoulder, making us both shake.
I laugh into his shoulder, "I'm sorry it took me so long! I had to pack a bag and then the subway was late, it's a whole mess."
Changbin takes my hand and pulls me into the elevator, where he pulls off the backpack from my shoulders and swings it on his own. Then he hooks his arm around mine again and pulls me closer to himself.
The sudden, casual closeness is unusual for me, but I enjoy it. Changbin's closeness feels like Felix's. Platonic. Soothing. Comforting. Cuddling with Changbin feels like I imagine cuddling with a brother would feel like.
"I hope you don't mind," Changbin says then, "We already ordered for you. The pizza arrived like ten minutes before you got here, so it should still be warm."

We get to the front door and he unlocks it.
"Ollie," Felix waddles over, throwing his arms around my middle. "I missed you, I'm so glad you're here!"
The apartment looks just like it did the last time I was here, except a pile of shoes topples out of a wardrobe by the door, and the couch is pushed away from its usual place.
In its stead, pillows and blankets are piled on top of multiple thin mattresses laying side by side.
"We're having a big sleepover," Hyunjin says beside me as he follows my eyes. He points to the pizza boxes and a plate stacked with brownies. "Felix made these for us!"
Minho, Seungmin, and Jeongin join us in the living room, carrying bowls of cut up watermelon, green grapes, popcorn, and sticks of carrot. Each of them hugs me hello as best as they can.
That's when I notice that all of them are wearing some sort of pajama or sleepwear already.
"I should probably get changed, too," I say and Changbin hands me my backpack. "Where's Channie?"

"I'm here."
I turn in time to catch Chan step out of a room. His hair is wet and it curls wildly. He's barefaced, and, just as he comes closer, he pulls a black shirt over his head.
My eyes travel down his muscular torso, over the curves of his pecks, the smooth skin, and the ridges of his abs, as he covers it, and I swallow dryly.
Someone bumps his elbow in my side - probably Felix - and I force myself to look into Chan's face again. There's a glint in his eyes when he meets my gaze.

Oh, this was on purpose. He knows what he just did. It's probably payback.
Chan is toying with me.
I smack my lips and pretend like nothing happened.
"There you are," I say cheerfully and step towards him, "So good to see you!"
When he hugs me, I stand on my tiptoes to get as close to him as possible and slyly drive my right hand over his neck and into his curls.
His body tenses.
This game is played with two players.

I twist myself out of his embrace and grab my backpack. Out of the corner of my eye, I can see Felix wink and grin at me, while I disappear into the bathroom.
I pull out my sleep attire, a big shirt and a pair of short lounge shorts, and pull them on. Then I pull out Chan's sweatshirt of my backpack. I had planned on giving it back today, but I changed my mind. I pull it over my head and look at myself in the mirror. My hair is a bit messy from the wind outside and I try to tame it with my fingers. The sweatshirt covers most of my pajama, only a bit of my shorts sticks out at the bottom. I think I look cute and comfy, so I open the door and step out again.

By now, everyone has gathered on the pile of pillows and blankets, the lights are dimmed, a window is slightly opened to let in some fresh air.
The boys are huddled together, piled on top of each other, legs and arms intertwined like one big knot. They're discussing something, calling and yelling over each other, each one trying to be heard over the others.
Changbin is the first to notice me.
"Ah, Ollie," he says and waves me over, "Come sit, let's eat!"
When the rest of the group turns to look at me, I wish for a second that I had chosen not to wear Chan's shirt. Who did I think I was? His girlfriend?
Fuck, how embarrassing.
I see how Minho nudges Chan with his elbow and smirks. Felix notices it, too, and stretches out his hand towards me. He smiles warmly.
"Come sit here," he says and moves over to make space for me. "We're deciding what movie to watch later."
I sit down next to him, Jisung on my other side.
Jisung hands me a piece of the pizza he has in front of him, and says, "The shirt suits you. Better than Chan-hyung anyways."
"Hey!" Chan throws a pillow at Jisung's face but he dodges it quickly and laughs.
I thought it might bother them, bother Chan to see me in his clothes. But I might have been wrong, as Felix laces his arm around my back, and soon the chatter rises up again, laughter and voices filling the room.
When I reach across to Jeongin, who is holding the bowl with the grapes, I take the chance to glance at Chan.
To my surprise, his eyes are already on me.