Letters On Our Skin || BangChan

Special Chapter, after everything

"I can't believe I let you talk me into this," I rub my face, smearing cake batter over my cheeks, "How am I going to make enough food for eight grown men, a family of four, my father, and all of us?"
Chan chuckles and I turn to face him.
It's been seven years since we met. Both of us have changed. My hair is longer now, I am wearing glasses.
Chan has gained a few freckles and a few faint wrinkles beside his eyes from laughing too hard and too long.

"It wasn't my idea, Ollie," he says now and wraps his arms around my middle from behind, "You invited our entire family for Christmas dinner. That's all on you, Mrs. Bang."
I roll my eyes, but heat creeps into my cheeks. It's bin three years since we got married and part of me still can't believe it. Olivia Bang.
Who would have thought?

"Anyways," I turn in his arms to look at him, "We're very lucky Lix and Binnie are helping us prepare everything. I still need to make potato salad, cut up all the vegetables for the platter, fry the meat balls-..."
"Don't forget the apple sauce for Jamie," Chan interrupts me.
"Right," I spy over his shoulder, "Wait, he's been suspiciously quiet. Where is Jamie?"
"Helping Lix with the tree."

"Don't let him go near the candles," I chuckle and Chan leans down to kiss the top of my nose, "He's two, he'll burn our house down on accident."
Chan salutes with a overly serious face.
"Aye, Ma'am!"
Then he turns and marches out of the kitchen.
A second later, I can hear him call across the house.
"No, Jamie, mom doesn't want us playing with fire today. I know, she's such a meanie."
I turn back to my cake batter, laughing.

James Dae is our oldest. Two years old, but already quick-witted like his dad. Smart and beautiful. He has Chan's big brown eyes and dark hair. Jamie loves chaos and all his uncles, but especially Lix - his godfather and forever brownie-supplier. He loves chocolate cookies and apple sauce and playing hide and seek with Uncle Minho.
Jamie laughs as loud as plane turbines and sings along to all his dad's favorite songs in the strong, proud voice of a toddler who just learned how to speak a year and a half ago.

As I mix another egg into the cake batter, the device clipped to my belt starts vibrating. Not a second later, an earth-shattering cry sound through it.
"Channie," I call over my shoulder, "Can you get Nova? I think she's hungry."
Changbin pokes his head in through the opening.
"I'll get her," he says, "I'll bring her down."
"Okay."

Five minutes later, Changbin walks into the kitchen with my daughter on his hip.
Nova Jun, our youngest. She'll turn one year old in two months, but she mumbles and brabbles with the ferocity of a politician.
Now, her little head is placed on Binnie's shoulder, her small arms wrapped around him. Her hair, a tuft of dark blonde hair, is messy from her nap, but her eyes are wide open.
"Hey baby," I coo and give her a kiss on her head, "Do you want something to eat? Are you hungry?"
"Yeah," she answers and absentmindedly slaps Bonnie's shoulder, "Banana."

"Uncle Binnie will do it," Changbin says and grabs after a banana from the fruit basket, "Let's let mommy work in peace and go look for daddy."
Changbin winks at me as he carefully carries Nova out of the kitchen and to the living room.
My heart swells when someone puts on Christmas music in the living room and children's laughter echoes into the kitchen.
Nova adores Changbin. Ever since she was born she could fall asleep within minutes in his arms, faster than in anybody else's.
Chan and I have always joked that our kids chose their godparents, not us.

I finish the cake and cut up all the vegetables, when our front door opens.
"Hello, Uncle Hyunjin is here," a voice brushes through the house.
Immediately, another two voices chime in.
"And Uncle Jisung!"
"Uncle Minho, too!"
The door closes, a rush of cold air from outside bristling through the kitchen, and Hyunjin steps into the room.
"We brought food," he says and places bowls and plates wrapped in aluminum foil on the counter, "Or rather: Minho made food, and Jisung and I carried it over."

I press a welcome kiss to his cheek, then doing the same to Jisung and Minho.
"I'm so glad you're here," I say to them, "The kids are with Chan, Lix, and Binnie in the living room."
"What, and you're here all by yourself?"
Hyunjin smacks his lips amd rolls up his sleeves, looking around the kitchen.
"I'll say hi, and then I'll be back to help you."

There's happy screeching and toddler babbling from the living room when the three men go to greet the rest of the family.
Hyunjin helps me with the potato salad. As he then fries the meatballs and sautés chicken, I prepare the kimchi my dad brought over a few days ago, and make bulgogi.
Together, we prepare all the food for the kids, as well. Applesauce, chicken nuggets in dinosaur shape, homemade potato fries, and fruit with yoghurt.
Nova likes soft food, since her teeth have started coming in a few weeks ago, so we put out a spongy cake.

When all the food is finally done, I retreat to the master bedroom to get dressed and done.
I slip into a maroon dress with loose sleeves and floaty short skirt, a pair of tights, and a hairband in the same wine-red color of my dress.
The door opens and Chan comes in when I'm about to be done with my makeup.
"Seungmin and Jeonginnie just got here, they asked where to put the pie," he says as he steps up behind me in the mirror.
I stand.
"With the other deserts in the kitchen," I answer and he smiles.

"That's what I told them," Chan answers and pulls me into his chest. I catch his sparkling eyes in the mirror as he slowly pulls up the zipper of my dress to close it.
He presses a kiss against my neck and I giggle.
"You're as beautiful as the day I met you," he murmurs against my ear and I lean against his chest.
"I love you," I whisper and raise his hand to my lips to press a kiss to the back of his hand.
He turns our hands over and writes into the palm.

I LOVE YOU

Then he kisses me. A real kiss, gentle and yet passionate. Deep and slow.
"Remind me of this talk when tonight is over," I whisper against his lips, "Then we should continue this conversation."
He smirks and playfully bites my lower lip as he kisses me again.
"Deal."

When we descend the stairs, the front door opens again.
"Dad!"
My father steps through the door, bundled up into thick jackets, a scarf, and a woolen hat. He's holding a tower of Christmas presents, that almost topple over when Jamie rushes towards him and wraps himself around his grandpa's legs.
"Merry Christmas everyone," Dad says and laughs from deep within his belly, "Look who I found by the front door!"
Behind him, Binna and Hana step in, grinning from ear to ear.

Each of them holds a small girl in their arms, just a year older than Jamie.
Binna and Hana, my favorite love story besides my own, have not married yet. It's difficult for two women in love to get married in Korea.
It took Binna a while to accept it. Just two years ago, she threatened to move to Australia if it meant she could marry the love of her life.
But then Imani and Farai, twin sisters, came into their life. The two little girls were orphans in need of a family and a home, which Hana and Binna loved to provide.

Imani and Farai are lovely little girls, joyful and gentle. Hana and Binna are perfect mothers.
The four of them drop their stuff all over the house, all the children running off to play with their toys, as Hana and Binna put down the rice cakes on the already full table, and come to hug me hello.
I love them like sisters. Binna and Hana are more than my best friends, they're as much my family as Felix, Minho, Jeongin, Changbin, Jisung, Hyunjin, and Seungmin.

The house is full.
Filled with family. Filled with friends.
It's full of love.

We sit and eat. Everyone is laughing. Chan holds my hand as we drink wine. The table is bursting with food. We play with the kids. We exchange gifts.

As I look around the room, as I take in all these faces, I know that this will never leave me.
All this love will be with me forever.
Chan will be by my side until the day I die. Our children will grow, Chan and I will see them go their way together with our entire family behind us, all twelve people of it.
There is nothing in the world that I want to see happening as much as this. And there is nowhere else I'd rather be than right here.

With the people I love.