Cherry-picked Pitfall

Chapter XV

THE PAINT of the wall turned into dirty white. The low ceiling and religious sculptures were obviously untidy. Luma na rin ang mga upuang kahoy na nakahilera sa kabuoan ng chapel. They were around 20 benches based on my estimate and looking on how they looked like, they were brittle enough to break when you push it so hard. Halatang ngayon lang nila ito naasikaso. Getting fund might be a struggle here in Islas de Hermoso Fuego. Bakit hindi na lang sila magpa-sponsor mismo sa City Hall o sa nagpapatakbo ng mga isla? I doubt they were not fortunate enough to help.

Then I shifted my attention to something else, realizing I was near the altar, standing in front of Him. A short smile was formed on my lips as I looked directly to the spot where you promise your affection with someone you were committing with.

I was trying to picture how it looked like back then, how we looked like back then, and how enchanting we were back then to be there-swearing love in front of the most important people in our lives and letting Him bond with our relationship.

But that love ended to be the only thing that was left between us. No trust. No respect. No anything, except love. And that one thing that bonded us was also the one that broke us apart. That love broke us apart.

Closing my eyes, my hands fisted. Because I couldn't. It was cloudy. It was blurry enough to not remember anything that was worth cherishing. Hindi ko na maalala kung kailan ako huling naging masaya kasama si Caleb. Hindi ko na maalala kung kailan ko ba ulit naramdaman ang pinangako niyang pagmamahal sa harap ng altar.

Nanginig ang talukap ng mga mata ko matapos kong ipilit na mayroon, na mayroon pa rin naman kaming masayang napagsamahan. . .sana. . .

Then I realized. This was more heart shattering. When you could not remember any moment that you felt so much happiness after being loved by the person you chose to live with your lifetime.

On a second try, while my eyes were still closed, I remembered that day. . .

Today, I am the luckiest woman alive.

But that--that didn't feel the same way.

Of course, I wasn't the luckiest woman when I married Caleb. I hated that wedding gown. We even fought about it looked so extravagant. I actually wanted a simple one, something I could glow more in simplicity and elegance.

Standing in front of the man of my dreams, Caleb Finley Monsalve, who married me on my 22nd birthday.

I wasn't the same 22-year-old girl back then. Remembering that, I knew Caleb Finley was definitely not the guy of my dreams. I settled for him, cherished him, showered him my love, because he was just there, showing me affection like I could not get that somewhere else.

We fought at times but I remembered letting that pass and gave importance to his feelings more than mine.

"Sera, do you take Caleb here present as your husband according to the right of our holy mother church?"

Now, I kind of wish I didn't.

"Do you give yourself to him as his wife?"

Of course. . .not.

Hinimas ko ang pisngi kong nabasa na ng luha. If I could just turn back the time, knowing that this would happen. . . I would not marry him.

"Sera." I sniffed before looking back at where that voice came from. It was Brother Kalypso. Hawak niya ang bible na mukhang ilalagay niya sa altar kaya naman, umatras ako para makadaan siya. I was kind of blocking the way.

"Ayos ka lang?" His voice was calm which made me just nod. "May misa mamaya ang pare, dadaan ka?" It sounded like he was expecting me to attend mass later.