Joan

Chapter XXV

It's hard to imagine, but it's only just becoming afternoon as we continue following the prints. And when I say "we", I mean me since I'm the only one that can see them- the others are just following my lead.

Everything's going pretty smoothly, just a tad too slow and mundane for my taste but hey, it's better than nearly being bird food so I have to count my blessing I guess. Though I wish something interesting would come up, Chasan pressuring me to come up with a plan isn't what I had in mind.

"So your big plan to get your brother back is going to play out how?" He begins. "Are you expecting him to simply hand him over like a fair player?"

I shrug, "No."

"Do you even know what this guy is capable of? To the full extent?"

"Nope."

"How exactly do you expect this to play out in your favor then?"

"You know, I think it's time for life lessons with Joan," Since there's nothing else to do but, you know, walk. "The lesson of the day: expect the unexpected, the end."

"I can respect that," Nimu agrees. "Life is unpredictable, that's a given, but I do believe that it is wise to have plans just in case- especially going up against someone like Tymos."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, slow your roll and let's put some protection on. Let me tell you about a time where I, Joan, planned and it made no fucking difference to the situation."

Though I will admit that being a careful planner has never been part of my DNA, I actually used to think about my actions before doing them, but the older I got the more instantaneous I became- and for good reason.

"So there was this one time when I was seven or eight- I can't remember- and I was in the mood for a candy bar- a Twix, but you don't know what that is anyway- but my mom wouldn't buy one for me when we were checking out because it was almost dinner or some excuse like that, maybe I was being a brat that day, I don't remember. But anyway, I was dead set on getting a Twix bar so a little later while my mom was busy buying some other stuff, I was formulating a plan for how to get a Twix. So I finally decided to go with this harebrained scheme that, to my seven or eight-year-old brain, shoulda worked. Plan was, I was going to cause a scene outside the store, get the person manning the register to go out and check on it while I sneak in unnoticed and swipe the bar then leave."

"So," Incoming judgment from Chasan in three, two- "Your plan was to steal this candy bar, this Twix thing?"

"Questions should be saved till after the story, please and thank you. Anywho, that was the plan- seemed foolproof. I get everything in place and throw a rock at the window- that was my distraction. I didn't throw it hard enough to shatter it completely but I did manage to put some cracks in it. It was enough for the store owner to go and investigate while I ran around to the back and got in from the side door. I swiped all the Twix bars that were there and start to head back to the side to slip out but then the guy comes back in and I have to hide since, you know, the store's not that big and all. While I'm hiding in the aisles, his wife comes out from the back- which I wasn't aware existed- and she comes to see what's going on and so I'm kinda trapped. Trapped but not screwed. At least until I drop one of the bars and they notice me hiding. To make a long story short, I was trapped and screwed by that point so I just gave up without a fight and admitted to throwing the rock at the window. My parents had to pay for the repairs and to this day, I'm quite sure that couple doesn't like me still."

Looking back on it now, it was kind of an overly convoluted plan just for a Twix bar. I mean, younger me wasn't as slick as older me is now. But I remember the conversation had that day at the table with my dad- it wasn't a pretty one.