My Roommate Is A Tomboy

Jenny's Confession

I sat with a cold expression on my face, facing away from Jenny. The last thing I wanted to hear was their love story. She took a deep breath. For a moment I thought I would just 'fuck this shit' out of her and hit the door but her first sentence caught my attention.

"Ella hasn't been the same lately," she said.

I stayed. Just because I was curious to know more about what's going on with Ella. I waited for her to continue. When I realized she wasn't going to, unless prompted, I groaned inwardly and asked.

"In what way?"

"Well," Jenny sighed. "In every way."

I raised an eyebrow at her.

"She hardly has time for me," Jenny continued sadly. "She's suddenly always busy with her projects. She talks to me only when I do, never contacts me first, keeps all the conversations short and specific, hardly goes out with me anymore. And I had no idea that she even moved out, when did she move out?"

"Two months ago," I commented.

Jenny buried her face in her small white hands. Despite the situation I was going through as well, I actually felt sorry for Jenny.

"I don't know what to think," she sobbed. "She still seems as sweet as she was when we talk but something just feels off. Like the sparks died off from her side."

I sat like a dumb and goggled straight ahead.

"Maybe she's out of love with me," she continued. "Maybe i was wrong after all, to think I can make her love me like she did at first."

Poor Jenny! Ella never loved her in the first place. Jenny and I both forced her to.

"But she loves you," Jenny mumbled and then she stared straight into my eyes. I couldn't place what expression she was putting on but it kind of creeped me out. I felt quite pierced from her stare. It was a relief when she finally looked away.

"Falling in love with the wrong person is the loneliest feeling in the world," she added.

For the first time, I couldn't agree more with her. And everyone involved in that love have their own share of sorrow.

"Do you love her?"

I shook myself from the reverie and blinked at Jenny.

"What?" I asked again, making sure I heard her right.

"Liz, do you love Ella?" She repeated.

"Yes, I do," I answered calmly.

I didnt know where that calmness came from. I'm sure I would've been battling for an answer if it was some other time. Maybe I was just too tired to hide it anymore. Too tired to keep fighting and wondering.

"Its no surprise," Jenny replied glumly. "In the end, it's all on me. I should have known my limits. Should have left you both alone."
Jenny was actually owning up for her audacity and I know how low she was stooping from her standards to admit her faults. It surprised me.

"She doesn't wanna be with me," she said.

You might call me a sadist, but I felt a stroke of happiness inside that I could die from.

"I want her to be happy," she continued. "So you make her happy."

I gaped at her. Her expression was unflinching.

"You're serious!" I exclaimed, more as a surprise than a statement.

"You may leave," she simply said.

"Bu-

"Good day Liz," she said firmly. From the tone of her voice, I know the conversation had been dismissed. Nothing more to say that would be heard, I stood up and walked out slowly.

Dazzled and stunned from what just took place, I emerged out to the hallway. My head reeled from what I should do or go next. I got my phone out and called Ella. There were many things to be done but the first thing was to find out where Ella had been crashing for the last two months.

No one picked up. I dialed again. Again, the silence was the last tone. Now I was really confused about what to do. I could go to Courtney but it was almost class time. I decided to go back to my room and get ready for class.

Twenty minutes later, I was sitting at my table in the class. I had told Courtney about the exchange I just had. She told me to think of it as a mission to find Ella. And that is what I intended to do.

I called again. Still no answer. Maybe she was already in class. I typed a quick text.

"Call me... ASAP"

The whole day, I felt tension building in me. I gazed at the clock in the class. I was anxiously waiting for lunch break because I had a faint hope that I'd see Ella during lunchtime.

When lunch break came, I literally dragged Courtney and rushed to the cafeteria. We were one of the first people to reach there.

"Don't be too hasty Liz," Courtney remarked. "If we're gonna meet her, we will meet her."

We sat at a table where our eyes could cover all the entrances to the cafeteria. I kept watch the whole time. I saw Jenny and Lena coming in but no Ella. Slowly, students dispersed one by one.

"Have something," Courtney nudged me. "Break time's almost over."

I tried to eat but I couldn't force anything inside. I felt so disappointed. i thought if Ella wasn't here, maybe she didnt come to lunch, or maybe she didnt come to class at all. If so, she would've picked my calls. Could she be sleeping? But she usually doesn't sleep during the day. I thought about how she looked when I last saw her. Saw her disappointment. Saw her pain. Where is she staying anyway?

"Aargh! Give your head a break, Alice Meyer!" I said to myself.

Courtney looked up at me.

"Seriously," Courtney sighed. "Don't stress too much about it."

I forced a bite of pizza inside. It tasted like paper. I sipped the coffee to wash it down and almost spat out. It was extremely bitter.

"How come its so bitter?" I said making a face.

"Too much cocoa perhaps," Courtney said airily, taking a big gulp from her cup. "But I don't mind. I like my coffee bitter. Shall I drink yours too?"

Still making a face, I pushed my cup across to her. Grinning she snatched it.

"Nothing like Star cafe's coffee," I said absentmindedly and immediately remembered something.

The bell rang.

"I got to go," I said to Courtney as I urgently stood up toppling my chair.

"Hey,"

"Take care of my stuff," I called as I started running away. "I'll be back for them later."

Before Courtney could respond, I was halfway across the cafeteria.

I needed to see Monica.