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"hyung do you think i'm a bad person?" jimin asked out of the blue as yoongi looked at him

"you are literally one of the best people i've met jimin" yoongi said as jimin slightly smiled.

"i guess i can tell you what happened, i trust you enough" jimin said as yoongi looked at him again, this time with worry in his eyes.

"jimin you don't have to if it's going to remind you of the past" yoongi said as jimin shook his head.

"me and siwoo met in office, he was four years older to me" jimin started as yoongi turned to him.

"we got along really well, we used to laugh and joke around and our bond was almost unbreakable" the boy said as yoongi listened

"after a year of knowing each other, siwoo asked me out and i said yes, we started dating after that" jimin said as he smiled recalling the pleasant memories.

"he treated me like a prince, he'd litter me with kisses and compliments, he'd buy me gifts even though i told him not to, he'd always have time for me, he was good in bed, to sum it up, he was everything you would want in your boyfriend" jimin said as yoongi nodded.

"it was our two years anniversary, we were going to meet at a restaurant but i decided to surprise him, i made dinner for the both of us and went to his apartment" jimin let out a sigh

"but i was the one who was surprised instead of him, when i opened the door to his apartment, i saw him fucking a boy on the couch, it broke me" jimin said as yoongi slightly patted his shoulder

"i let him explain himself instead of getting angry and storming out, but guess what he said, he said that he had never been serious about our relationship, he was with me because i was hot and pretty, i was his boy toy" a tear rolled down jimin's eye.

"i-i walked out of his apartment and i shut everyone out for weeks and when i finally decided to get out, it all came crashing to me" jimin said

"i had been so invested in him, i was so in love with him that i forgot to give myself time, i forgot who i was, those two years i was all about siwoo, and that's when i realised that i had literally lost myself, i had beleived all his sweet little lies and compliments,i didn't know who i was anymore" jimin sighed

"and then i thought that love is about handing yourself to someone, completely being committed to someone, so committed that you lose yourself in the process, that's what love is right? being all about your significant other" jimin said as yoongi looked at him

"or maybe i perceived love the wrong way, maybe love is finding yourself while loving the other person, finding a new version of yourself that you never knew existed, maybe it's about the both of you bringing out the best of yourselves" jimin said

"and maybe i wasn't in love with siwoo the entire time, maybe i just liked the idea of someone spoiling me, of someone being fond of me and just experiencing the feeling of dates and kisses and everything else, maybe i just liked that i had what the actors and actresses had in movies" jimin said as yoongi nodded slightly.

"so i convinced myself that siwoo was a mistake and it was hard and it took me a very long time but i did bring the normal park jimin back" jimin said as yoongi smiled.

"and i'm so proud of you for doing that" yoongi said as jimin smiled.

"me too"

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