Now All That's Left is Dust

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Chapter Twenty-Eight

Past

What is fucking happening to me?

Putting on my thinking face, I stared blankly at the wall as if the words I was looking for were written there. Hindi ko maiintindihan ang sarili ko. I've been so hard with myself lately, and I think about someone I have nothing to think about, even when my head is filled with thoughts. I even found myself having a late-night conversation with the moon sometimes.

Hindi pa naman siguro ako nababaliw, 'di ba? If I am not getting crazy, then what exactly is happening to me? Nagbibinata?

"Nathaniel James, are you listening?"

Kagaya ngayon, nagsasalita si Mommy at kinakausap ako pero hindi ko nasundan ang sinasabi.

Kumurap ako at kaswal na itinuon ang tingin kay Mommy.

"Hm?"

Mom shook her head unpleasantly. I wonder what did I miss?

While eating breakfast with Daniel at Abigail, Mom was talking about something. Regarding a friend's daughter who just went home after years of studying abroad. I remembered Mom broadcasting the daughter's accomplishments. Pero hindi ko nasundan. The topic is very dull to put me into focus on, and I don't give a damn about other people's life and business.

"Ang high mo, Kuya." puna ni Abigail sabay humagikhik.

Hindi pa ako nakasagot para idepensa ang sarili ko, sumingit na si Mommy at ang kanyang kilay.

"What are you thinking, Nathaniel James?"

"Work." mabilis kong pagsisinungaling.

I caught Daniel's irritating grin after. Kung may kasinungalingan man akong sinasabi, si Daniel ang unang makakaalam no'n.

I don't believe in twin telepathy. Pero marami nang pangyayari at insidente na nagpapakumbinse sa akin na totoo. Scientifically, it is true. Similar genes produce similar brains, which process very thoughts and feelings. It's almost like sharing your brain with someone else, and it's annoying.

Daniel and I can access the thoughts and feelings of one another without one of us giving any prompts or signs. Since we're identical, we share an almost similar genetic framework which results in the development of a nearly identical brain. Our brains function almost identically, leading us to the same thoughts and feelings even when kept apart.

Although we two have different personalities. Because we are raised together, we often feel the need to be unique and stand out from the other. While Daniel is the happy-go-lucky type, I am the serious one. Hindi naman ganoon kaseryoso. Gago rin ako pero mas gago lang talaga ang kambal ko.

"What about your work?"

"We found a drug substance in the dead body of the woman. Are you familiar with cocaethylene, Mom?"

Mom slowly shook her head. "No."

"Cocaethylene is a pharmacologically active substance formed in the body when a person co-ingests ethanol and cocaine. The forensic blood samples of the body are positive for both ethanol and cocaine, a true quantitative determination of the amount of CE present."

"So?"

"It was a drug overdose death. Not suicide."

"What's your work again, man?" Daniel suddenly but in, grinning and smirking.

Hindi ko nagugustuhan ang ngiti kaya tinignan ko ng masama.

"Shut up."

"What? I'm serious. You're a forensic toxicologist, right?"