Runaway

Chapter 28: Ethan

I'm awoken in the middle of the night by Mia who suddenly jolts upright, screaming "get away from me, get away" with tears streamed down her face. I wrap my arms around her to try and calm her down to king her back and forth just repeating softly "Its ok me, it's just me Ethan, I've got you". After about 10 minutes she'd calmed down and we back asleep.

Now I'm laying in bed, wide awake. I have not idea what just happened. All of a sudden Mia was sitting up sobbing in bed. I'm guessing she had some sort of nightmare but I have no idea the cause was. It got me thinking about if this happens often and what caused them and so many questions that I didn't have the answers too.

Sleep continue to evade me for the rest of the early morning so I decided to get up, shower and go to the local bakery to grab us some breakfast for Mia wakes up. Walking back intoy bedroom with coffees in hand and a bag full of pastries I notice Mia is just starting to stir.

I walk over and side on the side of the bed and bend down and kiss her forehead "Morning beautiful " and she was that is definitely not a lie. I love seeing her first thing in the morning but I do notice that her eyes are pink probably due to the early morning nightmare she had.

She hid her head in the pillows as a small blush creeped onto her cheeks. I pass her the coffee as she sits up and leans against the headboard and open the bag of pastries for her to choose what she'd like "Morning and thank you" she says as she grabs for a croissant.

I know I need to ask her about last night but I'm not sure how to even bring it up. Does she even remember what happened, I have no idea but I do things the only way I know how "So how are you feeling after last night? Do you want to talk about it?"

She doesn't look up from the food in front of her "I'm ok but I really don't want to talk" she whispers then she takes a sip of her coffee still not looking at me.

I need to find out what going on, I thought she had learnt how to trust me. With the amount of time we spend together and whatever this relationship is we have going on, because we really haven't talked about that either because whenever I bring it up she just keeps telling me she likes things the way they are, why have labels.

"Mia" I say a little to strongly "You know you can talk to me. I'm happy to listen but you need to let me in"

"I'm fine Ethan can we please just drop it?" as she goes back to picking at her croissant

"No" I raise my voice at her. I know I shouldn't but she's shutting me out "Why can't you tell me. You wake up screaming in the middle of the night and can't even tell me what's going on. How is that fair. I care for you Mia and you keep blocking me. I thought you trusted me" I know my voice is louder than it should be but I can't help it, I'm getting frustrated, why can't she just tell me

What happens next, shocks the hell out of me. She stands abruptly, grabs her bag and before going into the bathroom turns to me and says "Its none of your business. This is my life and if I'm not ready to let you in, you can't force me to" and with that she slams the door and I hear it lock.

Fuck I pushed her away again, but why can't she trust me, I don't get it. What could be so bad that she can't tell me. About 30 minutes later she opens the bathroom door changed into her clothes. "There is still a lot you don't know about me and my past Ethan... "she trials off obviously not wanting to give anything away "and I'm not ready to share that. So please just give me me time". And with that she walks out the door, I don't follow her I'm still trying to understand what just happened.

It's been 2 days since Mia walked out of my bedroom and I've given her the space that she asked for. I haven't tried to contact her but I feel like I need to just to let her know that I am here for her when she's ready, even if she doesn't want to tell me what happened that night.

I know I pushed too far but I was worried about her. What I saw that might scared me. I want to protect her from whatever is haunting her. I want to be somebody that she trusts fully, but I understand that she obviously has a past that she's not quite ready to share but maybe someday she will trust me with it, but I need to earn that trust. We have never defined our relationship but we are in some sort of relationship. I send her a quick message before heading into practice

Hey, hope you're ok. Sorry how things went the other day. Always know I'm hear to listen if you need me. Miss you xx

9nce hockey practice had finished I looked at my phone hoping that I had a message back from Mia but nothing. I could see she'd read the message but choose not to reply. Fuck I've really stuff things up now she won't even talk to me. I run my hand through my hair as I get slapped on the back

"What's up with you?" Jake questions "Havent been yourself the last few days" I haven't told anybody what happened with Mia when she stayed over last but maybe I should talk to Jake, he is pretty close with her.

"Hey can we talk, somewhere private" I sheepishly ask not really knowing how to start this conversation. Once Jake and I walk away from everybody else, I explain what happened the other night from Mia having the nightmare and then how I pushed her the next morning. Nothing is making much sense to me at the moment. She has always mentioned that I don't know about her past so I'm guessing that the panic attack at the party and this nightmare have something to do with that. Jake listens intently as I go through everything in my head and how I think something has happened in her past for these reactions.

By the look on Jake's face he doesn't seem all that surprised by how Mia has reacted. "Listen, I know she's had issues in her past but don't know the details. I think you need to be careful how you approach this. You two haven't gotten close over the past couple of weeks, everybody can see that. I think she'll open up when she's ready. I think it's pretty obvious with all that has happened with the panic attack at the party and work, and how she reacted to you asking about her nightmare" What did he just say, panic attack at work, when the hell did this happen. Now I have another lot of unanswered questions "You know I'm not good at this relationship shit, but just let her know you're there for her and don't push. Good luck"

And with that Jake starts to walk towards his car and I follow behind. I know she's not just going to come out and tell me what's going on. I'll just keep letting her know that I'm there for her and that's exactly what I do for the next couple of days. I send her good night messages every night so she knows that I'm thinking about her. Hell I'm always thinking about her lately and I need her to know that. I need her to know that whatever has happened in the past that is not going to affect how I feel about her. Now all I need is for her to respond.