the devil in miami • xxxtentacion

007

ahh its been a while... :)

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nova

9:06 pm

The Uber back to my house was almost silent, except for Jahseh anxiously tapping his fingers against the car door, and the radio lowly playing an upbeat song in the background.

How ironic considering that the vibe of this day was anything but upbeat.

The car comes to a halt, in a neighborhood I know all too well. I look at the still house from the window, and turn to look at Jahseh on my left. He hasn't moved an inch since the start of the car ride and it's actually scaring me. I debate on talking to him in this state.

"jahseh..." I whisper softly, touching his arm.

It feels like he's moving in slow motion, He jerks his arm away from my reach and eventually faces me, avoiding eye contact.

As soon as he does that, confusion shows all over my face, but before I can question him about it, he speaks again.

" I.. don't want to be with you." He says as he finally looks up at me to make eye contact. He continues talking.

"I don't want to be with you" he repeats, a little more certain, " I don't see anything with you. I will never want to be with you. I really just wanted to fuck, but I doubt that's happening. All that shit I did for you? Just for show."

I feel a sharp pain in my chest as I continue to stare at him, listening to him say words that you would never want to hear from anybody. I stare at him in his eyes until he shifts his gaze back to the window. Im at a loss for words. He speaks once again.

"You can go now." He says finally,

The way i'm staring into the side of his face should burn straight through his skin. I decide not to reply, fearing that it would be nothing but incoherent words of a sentence. I feel for the door handle holding back the copious amount of tears welling in my eyes. As soon as I'm outside of the car, the uber pulls off.

I make my way up the path to the front door, unlocking the door as softly as I can after seeing my grandmother's car in the driveway. Almost immediately after closing the door, the lights flicker on.

"Tell whoever just dropped you off, to double back and come get you, because you can't stay here anymore." My grandmother says from her stationary place on the couch facing the window.

can somebody give me a break.

"what?" I say, voice laced with agitation, confusion and a hint of sadness, turning my head around to meet her gaze.

She stands up from the couch, making her way closer to me.

"Did I stutter?" she says. we're almost face to face, with nothing but the couch blocking us from each other.

"get your stuff and get out." she starts again, "I told you who I won't allow you to see and you deliberately went behind my back and did what you wanted anyway. So since you want to disrespect me in my house. you can go."

I want to plead with her but honestly there's no use. That was the last time that I was going to see him, for sure. but she probably wouldn't have believed me anyway.

"you're putting me out, because I finally have people to hang out with? people that want to be my friend?" I say as i follow her, within a safe distance

she begins to make her way to the stairs, but stops in her tracks to turn around and look me in the eyes.

"THOSE PEOPLE AREN'T YOUR FRIENDS NOVA. WHAT DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND?" she spat at me.