Crossing Into Forever

Chapter 21

Ella had been trying to avoid Nicholas's gaze, because she wasn't sure if he was angry with her or what exactly he was thinking. She knew she needed to thank him for helping her. At least he noticed quickly what was happening and assisted her out into the hallway. She also knew if he had not acted quickly to get her the inhaler, she may not be sitting here awake and breathing right now.

She finally worked up the courage to speak to him, although she couldn't look at him. She closed her eyes for a second before she spoke, as if to muster up any last bit of courage, and her head was slightly turned down. Trying her best not to cry again, she managed in a quivering voice "am I in trouble?" He looked at her, considering how callus she must think he is. "Now Ella, why would you be in trouble for being sick?" His words were genuinely empathetic. It wasn't an emotion he allowed himself to display very often. Choking back tears, she managed to tell him she was sorry for what had happened and for all the trouble she had caused him since the day he rescued her. She was truly pulling at his heartstrings now. She, more than anyone he had ever known, had the ability to make his conscience ache. This young girl, who he had only truly known for such a short time, was testing his emotions. She was the most innocent and naïve person he had ever met. She was like a child, but in a woman's body, and that was what worried him. Not because of him, but because of those around them. She was an easy target for predators. It was impossible for him to watch her every moment to keep her safe.

"Ella, I know it is not your fault that you are here. You have done nothing wrong, and it pains me that when I first found you, I was angry. I was angry because I knew, if I would not have gotten to you in time, you would be dead. I was angry because I thought it was a foolish choice you had made, to follow Millicent, so you could pry into her business. I know now that I was wrong to accuse you of that. I had no way of knowing who you were or why you were there, and I have been lied to by many pretty young ladies so they could escape the consequences of their behavior. There are those who think their beauty will solve all their bad decisions in life. I didn't know you and as bad as it sounds, I had no reason to believe you at the time. You have caused no trouble that you could help. We all know this. You have no reason at all to apologize to me or anyone, for anything that has happened. As far as what was said today, it was brought to my attention right before class, that what I said had been misconstrued. I am not in the habit of being overly affable toward my students. I apologize that it sounded like I was blaming you today for what Christopher had done. It was in no way your fault."

Ella was surprised at what he was saying. He was being nice, and she felt funny when he referred to her as pretty. She had never thought of herself that way. She also felt awkward that he was apologizing to her. She didn't know what to say and she didn't really want to prolong the time she had to spend with him, especially alone. She knew she had to thank him and accept his apology, but she didn't know how to say it. She was still so uneasy around him. All she could manage was a weak "thank you". It didn't seem to bother him that her answer wasn't more enthusiastic. He stood up and walked to the door of his classroom. He announced to them that he would be back shortly and told them to work on their assignment that he had given them yesterday. He then walked out to where Ella was and held out a hand toward her. She hesitated for a second but then took his hand and he helped her stand up.

"Now, do you want me to carry you down to the infirmary or do you want to walk?"

She wasn't about to let him carry her anywhere, although, she had the vague memory that he had before. She pushed that feeling aside. "I can walk." She was hoping he meant for her to walk alone, but to her dismay, he motioned with his hand for her to go before him and spoke a very gentlemanly "after you".

The walk down was a little harder than what Ella expected. At least they were going downstairs instead of up though. He must have noticed that she was having some difficulty because he turned and looked at her for a second before speaking.

"Are you sure you're ok?"

She nodded her head, but didn't speak, because she didn't have the extra air. Before she knew it, she was being lifted up in his arms. She didn't have enough breath to argue with him. She was so tired from the short distance that all she could do was lean her head on his shoulder and close her eyes. She was surprised at how relaxing it felt to be carried by him. They finally made it to the infirmary, and he placed her in the bed. Then he announced to them that he was going back upstairs to his class and would be back down once it ended.