Just the typical sad marvel thing /Peter

╔══•LVI•══╗

[time skip - a week later]

Tony's pov:
I opened the door after the doorbell rang around 3 p.m. "Hello Dr. Raynor," I let her in. Dr. Raynor still comes to Peter every day. It's been a week now. I'm glad Peter is accepting her and he talks to her. Also, Peter started talking to us. I'm so happy he's sharing his feelings with us but it's so painful to listen to what he's going through. "Hello, Tony," she says hello and takes her direction to Peter's room while I close the door. We don't talk. She disappears into Peter's room and I'm alone again in the living room.

Dr. Raynor's pov:
As I head towards Peter's room, I can't help but think about the change in his attitude since our first visit. He's still withdrawn and quiet, but there's a spark in his eyes that wasn't there before. I hope that with time, he'll start to open up to me and let me in more. I know there's still a majority that he's holding to himself and I don't know about. I knock gently, waiting for Peter's response before stepping inside. "Come in," he shouts and I hear some rattling before I open the door.

I'm met with a room of disaster. There are clothes strewn across the floor and dirty dishes on his desk. It seems that Peter has not been taking care of himself or his space. I take a deep breath before addressing the situation. "Peter, you and your room are a mess. I am here to help you, but I cannot help if you can't help yourself first. We talked about this. What is going on?" Peter looks up at me, his eyes red and swollen from crying the night before. He takes a deep breath before speaking. "I'm sorry. I should have cleaned up before you came. It's just that some days, I can't even get out of bed," he says with his voice quivering. I nod understandingly, as I realize how vulnerable he is now. "It's understandable that you feel overwhelmed with everything that has happened recently. It has been a lot for you to deal with." He stays quiet. "Do you want to talk about what happened? Or is it too fresh in your mind?" He just shakes his head. I understand his reaction and the fact he can't talk tells me he's on the edge of crying today. "Let's just start with some small tasks that you can do to help you feel better. How about we start with some light cleaning? We can do it together, and then we can take a break and maybe talk about what's been on your mind." Peter nods, feeling relieved that I'm there to help him. He begins to pick up clothes from the floor. I help him by gathering dirty dishes and putting them in the sink. As we work together, I talk with Peter about how he has been feeling. Attempting to ask him to describe his emotions and thoughts, to help him with his depression. Peter begins to open up more and more. I think the packing drags his attention and anxiety away and he can open up more. I note to myself, that I should give him more distractions when I want to make him talk.

"So Peter. All week, last week, we talked about your stepdad. How did it make you feel?" I ask. "Uhm... well, I've had bad memories come back and... some nightmares," he says that last word so quietly I barely hear it. He's afraid to say he has nightmares because he never mentioned it before. "Oh, you had? Have you had nightmares about him before?" He nods rapidly. "Have you had nightmares about anything traumatic that happened in the past year? Since you've like got here or something around that time?" He continues nodding. I know I've reached another locked topic deep down in him. He doesn't say anything. Also, I see the glossiness in his eyes, I see it in his body language. He tells me a lot without knowing or saying anything. I see how he shudders so slightly every time he hears Matthew's name or how he avoids eye contact when I reach a sensitive topic. Today I planned to talk about another trauma in his life, his aunt. I don't know if he's ready to talk about her death but he has to start it someday. Maybe we'll go very slowly or leave it after a few sessions but I know I have to start talking about this to get him ready. "Did you have any nightmares about your aunt like this?" I tried connecting the two topics. He freezes. I expected him to react badly to it. I know how hard it is and I know this is more recent than most of the things. Although I don't know every detail, I have to ask Peter about them, I have to get him to tell me. I wait for his response. "Peter?" I ask. He's still standing above a shelf, frozen, holding a cup in his hand and I see a tear rolling down his face. "Please look at me. Kid, can you hear me?" He finally looks at me, horrified. "You don't have to answer, it's okay. I'm sorry I ran too forward." He silently puts the cup down and sits down on his bed. He wipes his tears and takes a deep breath. "I-I'm sorry I'm just... it's just a lot. A lot of thoughts and... it's not that I don't wanna answer your question," he sniffles. "It's okay kid. You don't have to I know it's hard." "No, I do. I do want to get- better now and I-I know the only way is if I am honest and willing to answer," he says now while choking back a cry. "I'm sorry, it's just..." he breaks down. He cries painfully. "We can talk about it later, it's okay," I try to comfort him. I didn't know how bad this would be for him, all I knew was what Bucky told me. He just told me she passed away and that she was like a mother to Peter. I don't know how deep a scar it actually left in him, not knowing the circumstances of her death. Maybe it was very traumatic for him and I should be much more careful with it... I should talk with Bucky about it. - I think as I'm calming Peter's crying down.

Bucky's pov:
Dr. Raynor finishes her session with Peter around 4:15 and comes out of his room with all his dirty dishes in her hands and gently puts them down on the counter. "Was that all in his room?" I ask, looking up from the book that I was reading. "Yes," she replies. "On another note, Bucky, we should talk," she says. I immediately think of something bad, something about Peter. But I just nod with my eyes widened and I gestured to her to sit down in the living room, as no one was around there, at the moment. "What is it?" I ask. She crosses her legs to get more comfortable before speaking. "I need you to tell me a little more in detail about the possible traumas in Peter's life. Like about his Aunt or even about his self-harm. I don't know how careful I should be, like today... I just tried to ask about his Aunt and he broke down. I have to get a bit more details about everything." I'm relieved she just wanted to ask about this and it's not as serious as I thought it would be. "Yes, of course," I nod. "Is that all?" I ask. She nods and stands up. "We could arrange a meeting by email when you let me know more details, okay? I'll write to you," she says. "Sure," I say and go to open the door for her. She says goodbye and walks out. Now that she told me Peter had broken down, I had to check on him.