VIRGIN AT 26!

8.

Weeks had passed.

I guess the whole George drama was over or so I thought and I had told Titi and Nana the whole thing, for the first time I saw how supportive my friends were concerning men issues in my life. Nana had also added how she had seen George with a girl in his car after the party that night but Titi just thought he could be right and I should allow things to flow that he could be a changed man now too.

Deep down I wanted to listen to Titi's advice, I wanted George to be a different man now. These past weeks had been torture upon torture, every nights I have had to go to bed with these yearnings. They were unbearable, bottling up my feelings for him was tough.

Truth was I get attached so easily to any man that gets so intimate with me, and George was no exception but also his was a totally different feeling. Have tried to forget about him, move on.

But I can't.

As a woman who had been in and out of relationships consistently, relationships that were built on lies, relationships that were solely based on self love, I have come so close to giving up on men that every confession from their mouth hit me like rotten eggs. That was why everything George had blabbed out that night made no sense at all. The feelings I have felt for all these men never lasted and I never brought myself to terms with trusting them.

But this feelings I had for George were genuine and I was yet to still let go. I was only scared and experiencing dilemma, getting dumped after their usual first fling, snitched upon cause God guys do that snitching a lot. Women gossip a lot but men gossiping is top notch.

There's absolutely nothing that hurts more than seeing someone you are in love with spill all the secrets shared between you two.

There were sleepless nights I envisioned beautiful moments with George, his touches like I had never done with any man and I have come to terms with the feelings I had for him, and I was secretly hoping he would just show up one day and swoop me off my feet and say those words I have always wanted to hear.

I was going to be 26 in a month to come, here I was trying so hard to reel myself to trusting one man, to give one man a trial, to allow one man to place me on a table of many options where I could find out just everything I was so nostalgic for.

Truth was, I had met a guy a month prior to meeting George too but George was a totally full cover on my face. There was this swelling in my heart every time Memories of our first night flashed, I just knew it was different with him.

My feelings for George were not new feelings and yet it was fighting so hard to stay, it was like a vie in my chest.